Category Archives: Psychopathology

Donald Trump: DSM Diagnosis – Axis 2: Narcissistic Personality Disorder (Severe), Prognosis – Grave

Whitedawg: I was kind of wondering, commenting about the personality traits/qualities of regular everyday people or elected officials, more so than Teddy. There is little doubt Ted crossed a lot of lines.

But it’s not so evident to most that President-elect Trump may have some serious problems that can influence his decision making and tweeting. Many people know non-serial killing psychopaths, sociopaths, and malignant narcissists. And some of those traits are looked at as positive.

Whitedawg, I am not sure if Trump is a Malignant Narcissist. However, a lot of people think Trump seems crazy. He seems very nuts or off to me too. The answer to the question is that Trump is indeed seriously nuts. He has a personality disorder. He has a serious or severe case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Some say it has gone over to Narcissistic Sociopath (not sure what that is) or Malignant Narcissism. I am not sure myself. Narcissistic Sociopath would not be a bad description of Mr. Trump.

If any of you ever wanted to know what a serious case of NPD looks like, study Mr. Trump good and hard. He’s a textbook case X 10.


Filed under Crime, Mental Illness, Narcissistic, Personality Disorders, Politics, Psychology, Psychopathology, Republicans, Serial Killers, Sociopathy, US Politics

Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Malignant Narcissism, and Sociopathy/Psychopathy

Whitedawg: I was kind of wondering, commenting about the personality traits/qualities of regular everyday people or elected officials, more so than Teddy. There is little doubt Ted crossed a lot of lines.

But it’s not so evident to most that President-elect Trump may have some serious problems that can influence his decision making and tweeting. Many people know non-serial killing psychopaths, sociopaths, and malignant narcissists. And some of those traits are looked at as positive.

I am not sure how many non-pathological Malignant Narcissists there are out there.

George W. Bush was said to be sociopathic and the same was said about LBJ. Hitler was clearly a psychopath, and he also had Paranoid Personality Disorder.

I have known a number of people who had what I would diagnose as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. At first they may seem likable, but there is something pretty awful about them somehow even when they are being good. The one I knew best caused massive damage to me in my life until I severely restricted contact with them. Another person close to me got to know two NPD’s very well and has recently fallen out with one of them.

NPD’s are harmful! If you get involved with an NPD, you are probably going to get harmed or damaged. It’s just what they do. They harm people. That’s their nature. I would advise any of you if you have any NPD’s in your life to think seriously about whether you want this person in your life or not. It’s possible to have them in your life while causing little or no damage, but more often than that, there’s something toxic about them. If they haven’t hurt you yet, they probably will at some point in the future. I don’t cotton to assholes much, and I’ve suffered far too many of them for one lifetime. I don’t have any NPD’s in my life, and that’s the way I like it.

It’s generally a good idea to get all of the Cluster B Personality Disorder types out of your life. Cluster B is Antisocial Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I have dealt with a few people who seemed pretty sociopathic in my life. They all harmed from me. Some of them stole from me. There is one I know to this day, and he is one of the most frightening people I know. The worst is you think he is nice because he has this sort of awful charm about him, so you go make friends with him again, and that’s always a big mistake. He came into my house, stole a $275 Guatemalan knife hanging on my wall when he had my back turned to him and was out the door. I was told he sold it for $10 to buy weed. He is a Bulldogs gang member, has scars from bullet wounds, and I believe he has a criminal record.

I knew his brother, and he came to my house one day carrying a small gun under his jacket. It was larger than a pistol but smaller than a rifle. I guess it was a semiautomatic. Not knowing guns, to me, it looked like a sawed off shotgun. He was bringing it to the local school where he attended in case he might have to fight his gang enemies. He told me he didn’t care if he lived or died anymore. He was only 19 years old when he told me that, a mere boy.

Last time he came over, I let him in and we sat down and watched some videos. He took out a very large knife and put it on the table. He said he did it to put me at ease. I actually did not mind that he did that. I prefer that if people are armed when they see me that they remove their weapons and place them on some furniture near us. That sort of evens the score a bit and shows a lot of trust. I suppose either of us could grab the weapon and murder the other person but it never happens. Plus I sort of like to live dangerously like an outlaw, and this is in line with that image.

A destructive sociopath comes into your life like a whirlwind. All sorts of wild and crazy things happen to you for a while, and it is like you are caught up in an exciting tornado thunderstorm. It’s all pretty wild and crazy, and nothing makes much sense, but you just go along because they seem so fun and charming, and these folks have a sort of a “pull” or attraction to them. I know of no other way to describe it but you might call it a forcefield. There is something about them, possibly in the very look in their eyes, that sort of hypnotizes you and sucks you into them and their world.

At some point, the sociopath vanishes from your life, whirling away in the distance like a funnel cloud. You look around at your life, and everything seems to be in ruins. It’s like someone came into your house and turned everything upside down, threw a lot of stuff on the floor, and now everything is a mixed up mess. You and your life have been seriously damaged by some unknown entity. You don’t even know what hit you. You look around at the human wreckage and think of the times when the sociopath was whirling around in your life and you think, “What in the Hell was that, anyway?”

These people don’t make sense. I have been studying sociopaths forever, and I have even done some psychological counseling with sociopaths. If they are young enough, you can still work with them to some extent and maybe prevent serious damage in the future. After decades of studying sociopaths, they still don’t make sense to me. I think the only way to understand sociopaths is to be one.


Filed under Antisocial, Borderline, Crime, Democrats, Mental Illness, Narcissistic, Personality Disorders, Politics, Psychology, Psychopathology, Psychotherapy, Republicans, Serial Killers, US Politics

Can Ted Bundy’s Crimes Be Blamed on Porn?

Jason Y: It sort of reminds me of happened to Ted Bundy in the 70’s, an otherwise, well-liked pretty boy who had been driven insane by something, some have claimed it was a BDSM porn addiction.

That is just an excuse. There was something wrong with that boy from Day One I am afraid. His home environment was horrible. His adoptive father was a cruel, wicked man who beat the family pets and hated Jews and Blacks, who he often went on tirades against. He was a real terror.

At age three, one of Ted’s aunt’s was visiting. She lay down to go to sleep in the bedroom, and when she woke up, there was little three-year-old Ted standing at the foot of the bed with an evil smile on his face. He had taken 10-15 knives from the kitchen and had arranged them all around her sleeping body with the blades pointed towards her. This guy was a Bad Seed, probably a born incurable psychopath.

Ted probably committed his first murder at age 14. He was working as a paperboy when an 8 year old girl disappeared right from his own neighborhood. He was friends with her, she had been over at his house before, and she had been seen over at his house at night in the few weeks before the killing. She had been abducted from her bedroom via a bedroom window. Tennis shoe marks were found below the window sill.  The size matches Ted’s shoe size.

The girl was never seen again. There was construction work going on at a nearby community college, and a large pit had been dug there. Ted was seen at the site of that construction pit watching over the workers two days after the disappearance. He had an evil little smile on his face.

Many years later, a native American woman complained that when she was near the school library, she often heard the horrible screams of a young girl. She kept making these complaints. At some point, an area near the library was excavated for some reason. The girl’s body was found buried there, many years after her disappearance.

Before Ted committed his first known murder, he made a couple of trips back to visit relatives on the East Coast near Maryland. He stayed there for a few weeks each time. During one or both visits, young women were raped and murdered near where Ted was visiting, say within 50-100 miles. The young women were college-aged. So Ted is suspected of 2-4 murders on the East Coast while he was still a university undergrad. All of these women were killed during the precise few-week periods when Ted was visiting the area. I believe that Ted killed these women.

Ted never fessed up to these killings, though he did admit to 36 murders. However, in privileged conversations with his attorney, the lawyer once asked Ted how many murders he had been responsible for. The lawyer threw out a figure of around 30. Ted smiled and said, “Add another figure to that.” This implies that Ted said he was responsible for over 100 murders. Since his execution, no new murders have been added to the 36 he is already suspected of, although there are quite a few cases of rapes and murders of young women near the various areas where Ted was living over the years.

Ted used to leave the bodies on rugged mountains. He would then go back to these kill sites and visit the bodies in the days after the killings. He would lie next to the bodies, put makeup and lipstick on the girls’ faces and have sex with the dead bodies, even days after the girls had died. He took a skull of one of the young women that he killed and hid it in his fireplace for a long time.

Ted’s victims often showed bite marks, typically very deep bite marks on the breasts. Ted seemed to go into some sort of a wild animal-like frenzy when he killed, beating the women to a bloody mess with clubs and tearing at their flesh around their breasts like a wild predatory animal, which is basically what he was. It takes a lot more than some exposure to “porn” to create such a depraved beast of a man. In fact, such monsters are probably more born than created.

Authorities long suspected Ted of having committed that first murder when he was 14 years old, and they tried many times to get him to fess up to it. But Ted always turned rigid and defensive whenever that case was brought up. Even the worst criminals have a hierarchy of evil. Some things are beyond the pale even for them.

Ted did not mind at all being thought of as the killer of beautiful young college-aged women, often with long brunette hair like his former girlfriend who broke up with him and broke his heart. He seemed to take some sort of pride in being a rapist and killer of beautiful young coed types.

He even went so far as to confess to the rape and murder of a 12 year old girl in Florida, one of the crimes that earned him the death penalty. The girl had been so savagely attacked that parts of her flesh had been actually ripped out with Ted’s teeth as he did his human predator frenzy routine on her. But a 12-year-old girl is on the edge of puberty, so she could seem to be heading towards a woman. And he got caught for that crime, and there was little he could do but confess.

Ted Bundy was a malignant narcissist or narcissistic sociopath like our current President-Elect Donald Trump, and indeed, Mr. Trump reminds me of Bundy in some ways. Malignant narcissism is where narcissism has gone clear over into sociopathy. The two problems are similar, and there is a lot of overlap. Most narcissists are a bit sociopathic, but the sociopathy usually stays rather limited because as sociopathy increases, your chances of success in life start to diminish, and the narcissist is all about being successful and especially being seen as successful in the face of others. Narcissists would probably like to do a lot more bad things than they actually do but are stopped due to the consequences, which they are painfully aware of.

Sociopaths on the other hand could care less what anyone thinks of them. They think they are the center of the world or perhaps that they are the only people who exist at all. Others are not even really humans to them but are seen more as objects like the tools in your toolbox that you can use for whatever purpose you wish or even destroy or throw away if you are so inclined.

In Malignant Narcissism, the narcissism has gone all the way over into sociopathy and you have what is for all intents and purposes a sociopath. And malignant narcissists can be pretty bad sociopaths. Bundy is not the only serial killer with Malignant Narcissism. However, in Malignant Narcissism, the sociopath craves the attention of others which he eagerly seeks out. He is very attentive to the opinions of others. Negative opinions can be devastating, and positive opinions can serve as sources of narcissistic supply.

Yes, Ted was extremely vain and also susceptible to the negative views of others. While being a coed killer might be just fine for Ted, there is little worse than a child killer. I suspect that Ted’s massive ego simply could not handle the blow to it that would have occurred once Ted got labeled a child killer. Ted could see himself as some heroic coed slayer, but no one likes a child killer. There is no criminal so reviled or despised. There is nothing even possibly heroic or noble in killing a little child, even for a man as depraved as Ted Bundy.

Based on Ted’s history, I would say that porn played little role in his development. Obviously Ted developed the BDSM fantasies of a severe sexual sadist early on in life somehow, maybe as early as age three. The “porn” Ted references is not even pornography. Ted liked to read and apparently masturbate to detective magazines. I am not sure if these are still around, but they used to be when I was younger. There were often many photos of rigged-up crime scenes with masked men holding knives or guns to struggling, captive, and often bound and gagged women. There’s nothing erotic there unless you get off on violent rape or even murder. Ted was already set up that way anyway, but the images in detective magazines simply fueled his pre-existing tendencies.

There was no porn problem with Ted Bundy. The porn thing was just made up by Ted the narcissist to attempt to take the blame away from his crimes and make his crimes the fault of something other himself. Of course narcissists are rarely wrong, and everything is the fault of some other person or entity. “Detective magazine porn made me do it” is just Ted’s narcissistic way of saying that all those murders were not really his fault.


Filed under Crime, Mental Illness, Narcissistic, Personality Disorders, Politics, Pornography, Psychology, Psychopathology, Republicans, Serial Killers, Sex, Sociopathy, US Politics

Lexapro Withdrawals

I usually take:

Wellbutrin 300 mg

Lexapro (SSRI) 30 mg. or even up to 40 mg. as needed

I’ve been on this regimen for a long time now and it works great. As needed is usually pretty frequently. Thing is I went off Lexapro on November 24. So I have been off of it for almost three weeks. 19 days to be exact. I didn’t feel much of anything for a while, but after 2 1/2  weeks, I got hit with a heavy dose of anxiety. I don’t usually experience this sort of thing, but of course I have in the past. The drugs work so well that it seems like do not have much anxiety going on, though others may differ on that. I dated a woman a while ago and she ended it pretty quickly. She said I was really nervous and I was making her nervous. I do some weird movement with my shoulders and I talk in these short, rapid, pressured bursts like I’m on cocaine. Thing was, the whole night of that date, I thought I was calm as an ocean and that is pretty much how I felt. I suppose like most things in life, anxiety is a relative thing. What might be a nervous wreck to one person can be complete calm to another because each  person is comparing the person’s state to a different thing.

Anyway, I think those might have been withdrawals I was experiencing. Here are some frequent withdrawals that people commonly report for Lexapro:

  • “Brain zaps”
  • Tinnitus
  • Nausea/gastrointestinal problems
  • Insomnia
  • Tingling feeling over the whole body
  • Itching all over the body, mostly in the face, arms, chest and stomach
  • Burning/dry skin on hands and forearms
  • Dry tingling mouth
  • Headache, sometimes in the upper neck/spine/migraine
  • Sinus pressure
  • Dilated pupils/blurred vision
  • Joint pains/Severe aches and pain all over the body
  • Pain in back and hips
  • Numbness/Pain in the fingertips
  • Parasthesia
  • No appetite
  • Weight loss
  • Fatigue
  • Mind feeling blank, spaced out, foggy
  • Feeling groggy/Hungover
  • Memory loss
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Disassociation
  • Dizziness
  • Anxiety/Agitation/Panic attacks
  • Out of breath
  • Anger, sometimes in explosive outbursts
  • Mood swings
  • Paranoia/Fear
  • Irritability
  • Eyes distracted by everything
  • Strong urge to cry/Crying jags
  • Sadness

Out of all of this stuff, I am only getting the anxiety/agitation. The rest of those symptoms mostly look pretty horrible, and I am glad I am not getting any of that stuff. But I often do not get a lot of the drug or drug withdrawal side effects that are listed. I don’t know, but I often avoid a lot of them. I am not sure what the mechanism is for why some people get this stuff and others don’t.

Most of this stuff applies to any other SSRI’s too, so if you any of you have taken or are taking these things and wish to discuss side effects/withdrawals, go right ahead and be my guest if you are not shy about revealing personal stuff.

Leave a comment

Filed under Health, Mental Illness, Psychology, Psychopathology, Psychotherapy

Why Are Straight Men Generally More Depressed and Repressed Than Gay Men?

From Quora.

My answer: 

They aren’t. Repeated studies done over many years have shown that gay men have much higher rates of depression than straight men. And anxiety for that matter. It’s not even debatable. Now why this is, is not known.

Repressed? Well gay male culture is pretty wild, and sex is a lot easier to come by. Gay men have told me that getting sex in gay culture is as easy as filling up your gas tank.

Straight men have to deal with the inhibitions of women, so that may well make us more inhibited. It’s just not so easy to get sex from women if you are a straight man. It’s much easier to obtain sex of you are a gay man, which is why gay men statistically have far more partners than straight men.

Straight men have to be careful about everything we say and do. Talk to the wrong woman? Whoops, you’re a creep. Looking at that woman over there? Call the cops, that’s creepy! And that’s not to mention anything remotely resembling a come-on, where people’s reaction often seems like you set off a grenade in the room. And on and on forever and ever.

Straight society is full of cockblocking idiots of both sexes. Married men are some of the worst cockblockers of all. A lot of young married men seem to have no other goal in life but to cockblock all the single men in sight. Modern feminism is extremely puritanical, and the idiotic specter of “sexual harassment” looms over much if not all straight interaction in public and even in private. When I go out in public, it often seems like the whole world is deliberately cockblocking me. White people are by far the worst cockblockers of them all, vastly worse than Blacks or Hispanics.

Gay culture is much more Wild West when it comes to sex, and they do not have to deal with a lot of the anti-sexual nonsense that women put out as the gatekeepers of sex.

Still, a lot of straight people are really opening up about sex and having lots of sex nowadays, so we are less repressed that we used to be. But most straight men would probably be uncomfortable in orgies and maybe even threeways. On the other hand, the number of gay men who have gone to such things as orgies or have threeways is extremely high. Group sex is definitely a common aspect of modern gay life.

What with the orgies, threeways, very high partner counts and general anti-Puritanical atmosphere of gay culture, it should be no surprise that gay men are more loosened up about sex than we are.


Filed under Culture, Depression, Feminism, Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Man World, Mental Illness, Mood Disorders, Psychology, Psychopathology, Race/Ethnicity, Sex, Whites

An Alternative Left Position on Transsexualism

Betty: Following the logic of your article, it would be ok to harm these people as the human rights don’t apply to them which is not right. I don’t get why it bothers people when trans humans want to be the opposite gender? Does it have an effect on your personal life in anyway? Are humans and their personality only defined by their gender? Definitely not. They still have emotions, thoughts and needs just like everybody else. They aren’t worse in their behavior than other people only because they feel wrong in their own gender.

And by the way they don’t choose to feel wrong. It’s the same as being gay, you can’t choose it. So it’s not ok to call trans people “things” or “nonhumans” only because they feel to be wrong in their own body/gender. If you define human beings ONLY over their gender then there’s something wrong with your view of humans in this way. Just let people live how they want to without degrading them. That’s not okay and it’s not just “saying your own opinion” when you say that you don’t like them in such a humiliating way.

The Alternative Left should support full human rights and tolerance for transsexuals. We do not wish for them to be harmed in any way. We do not agree with any crazy people being harmed. We believe people should be kind to transsexuals in person because that is how fellow humans who are not hurting anyone else should be treated. We support nondiscrimination against them in employment, with the caveat that you might be able to discriminate if they have to meet the public because they might harm your business by driving customers away. We do not support discrimination against transsexuals in housing, education or any government services. We feel that transsexuals are crazy, but we should be kind to the mentally ill.

We feel that there is no evidence that this is biological. The rate of it has exploded ~100X what it was in the 1960’s. There’s one on every corner now. We feel that that is very strong evidence that it is not biological and that it is some epidemic form of mental illness we are  experiencing. We also feel that it has become a fad and many people are becoming transsexuals because it is the cool thing to be. We believe that most transsexuals are simply homosexuals.

Many homosexuals identify with the opposite sex. It’s rather normal for them to do so. 

We think that in thethe past such folks would simply be the typical homosexual who acts like the opposite sex and they were perfectly happy that way, but nowadays with the transsexual identity open to them, many such persons are choosing to be transsexuals instead of just opposite sex-identifying homosexuals. In other words, we believe that if the people identifying as transsexuals now were alive in the 1960’s instead of 2010’s, 99% of them would not be transsexuals, and presumably they would be fairly happy and well adjusted nevertheless.

Obviously we see no need for people adopt this identity, and we note that in societies that do not tolerate such things, the rate of transsexualism drops up to 99%. In societies that promote or encourage transsexuals like Thailand, there is epidemic transsexualism. Thailand probably has the highest rate of transsexuals on Earth. Apparently the more you promote and encourage transsexuals, the more of it you end up with. Obviously this speaks against a biological disorder and in favor of a societally constructed condition.

13% of transsexuals re-transition. We say If it’s biological, why can’t they make up their mind if they are men or women? We note that there have been documented cases of completely spontaneous cures in which all symptoms of transsexualism lifted, the person simply dropped it as an issue, decided to identify as the birth sex and went on to be happy and healthy. 60% of underage transsexuals (kids and teenagers) lose all symptoms by adulthood. If it’s biological like homosexuality, how come it goes away a lot of the time?

Transsexuals are mentally ill. It’s a mental illness. But it is a mental illness that is being celebrated and  promoted and it is encouraging a lot of people to adopt this mental disorder just because it is the cool thing to do. We strongly disagree with the celebration and promotion of mental illness and especially with encouraging the spread of mental illness. It’s infuriating.

What if anorexics formed a group and called themselves a protected minority like these transsexuals and cheered on their anorexia, promoted anorexia to the world at large and encouraged others to be anorexic? Would this be acceptable?

What if schizophrenics were celebrating their symptoms, asking to be a protected identity minority, and encouraging other people to think they hear things, see things, believe things that are not true like the CIA is after you and act in very irrational ways? Would this be acceptable. And we believe that just to be hip, a lot of people adopt the Schizophrenic or Anorexic Identities to be cool, we would even get a new Identity Politics for them and they would become yet another identity protected class. We believe it would be very bad for society if anorexics and schizophrenics did this, and this is exactly what transsexuals are doing.

Alt Left position on transsexuals:

  • Bare minimal human rights for transsexuals.
  • Nondiscrimination against transsexuals employment with some reasonable limits.
  • Kindness and tolerance, but no more than that, to transsexuals because they are after all only humans with a mental illness.
  • Recognition that transsexualism is a mental disorder and the treatment of it as such.
  • A halt to the celebration, promotion and encouragement of the mental illness called transsexualism because it is bad for society and it is senseless to celebrate, promote and encourage mental illness.

* I had a transsexual as a potential client, and I was very nice to him too. I would have taken him on as a client also, and I would have been very nice to him.


Filed under Asia, Civil Rights, Discrimination, Employment, Gender Studies, Homosexuality, Housing, Left, Mental Illness, Psychology, Psychopathology, Regional, SE Asia, Sex, Social Problems, Sociology, Thailand

Case Study: Mr. X

This was recently posted in the comments, and I am going to approve the comment now. Since this person posted to public Internet comments, I assume they would not have much problem with my posting the comments up as a post. I mean what’s the difference, right?

The individual asked for a differential diagnosis of Schizotypal Personality Disorder and Avoidant Personality Disorder. However, he posted to a post called Differential Diagnosis of Avoidant PD Versus Schizoid PD, so he may want to throw Schizoid PD into the mix also.

I have so many comments to make on this post.

First of all, this individual, who we shall call Mr. X, is not all that unhealthy. I deal with people all the time who are far more unhealthy than this, and sad to say, I myself have even been much worse than this man is for way too long. How long you don’t need to know. Suffice to say, I looked at his comments and wished I had functioned that well when I was in bad shape.

He is able to perform the basic functions of life pretty well. He seems to be able to pack up and move to a new town, which believe it or not, is hard for a lot of adults to do.

He is able to live, survive and function well living alone for a long time now. His place is probably well managed, he probably eats well, etc.  I mean what is  going on inside his front door is pretty healthy.

As far as work goes, I think he is pretty healthy. He ran his own tree-trimming business for years and saved up a lot of money from that. He worked for his father at a drilling business for  several years and functioned well there. He managed to accumulate $500K worth of drilling equipment which he sold, so he is able to make a lot of money in our society. Most people do not have $500K net worth in their 30’s. It’s not that easy to do. He seems to be able to hold jobs, maintain them and function well enough at work to keep at jobs for several years at a time.

Believe it or not, a lot of folks can’t even do that! I’m not even very good at it. I tend to get fired wherever I am because somehow they simply come to dislike me. I’m rarely fired for a good reason because I am a good worker. A few times, I was fired for errors, but they were the sort of jobs where you could make errors even if you were a highly diligent worker. I’ve gotten to the point now where I can survive for up to 1 1/2 years without getting canned,  and that is amazing. I don’t think I am really meant to work with other humans. I probably have to work on my own or resign myself to floating from job to job.

He actually functions a lot better socially than he thinks he does. He is able to make and keep friends. He is able to befriend total strangers. He seems to be a good and loyal friend. In his youth, he was sort of a party animal who hung out all the time and had all sorts of friends. That seems to rule out Avoidant PD right there because no Avoidant PD would have a youth that looked like that and then turn Avoidant in adulthood. With all of the PD’s, we see strong signs of the PD even in  childhood and adolescence.

After all, Axis 2 or PD is meant to describe lifelong patterns. Dramatic behavioral change between adolescence and adulthood would seem to rule out a PD right there because PD’s just don’t look like that. However, he did have some Avoidant traits even back then, and it is perfectly reasonable in this case to diagnose PD traits because I believe that they are there.

He is able to date women, though he does not do so much. He was able to have a four-month relationship which was felt to be “too much,” once again suggesting Avoidant traits. However, a four-month intense relationship is not bad.  Further, he functioned so well in the relationship that the woman fell in love with him, wanted to marry him and even to have his kid. This to me implies that he functions fairly enough well in relationships because if you are a complete relationship retard, the scenario with the woman above really never happens to you.

He wears overalls six days a week, but that’s not pathological. On the other hand, you’re not trying to be the most charismatic man out there when you dress like that. Who are you trying to get? Lady truck drivers?

There is so much more I could say about this case, but for now.

Axis 1: Deferred.

I am going to defer on this for now because to me the main problem is an Axis 2 issue (personality disorder) as opposed to an Axis 1 problem (anxiety, mood or psychotic disorder). Sure, there is some mood and anxiety going on, but it seems to be driven more by the Axis 2 stuff as opposed to being generated on its own, which of course is typical with Axis 2.

Axis 2: Present.

There is definitely an Axis 2 problem here. The person has a longstanding  pattern of behavior that causes him major problems in life that is not related to anything on Axis 1. Instead most if not all of the person’s problems stem from the personality that they have generated for themselves starting in childhood.

There are a lot of problems with other people, and the individual himself seems rather dissatisfied with life. This is because the Axis 2 problem is causing conflicts and difficulties with others and because the Axis 2 problem is getting in the way of him living a happy, fulfilled and self-actualized life. Instead, the Axis 2 problem is causing a life that is lived below the individual’s potential, causing frustration even with the individual himself.

Further and most important of all, the man defends his unhealthy behavior, often fiercely. Obviously this is a core Axis 2 issue. At the end of the statement, he says he may not react well if someone tells him he is doing something wrong. Once again, we see Axis 2.

He person angrily reacts against anyone telling there is anything wrong with him psychologically, that he has an actual DSM disorder, that he needs to see a therapist, and in particular, that he needs medication. Axis 2 again, but he is sort of onto something because he is correct in his belief that he isn’t crazy (Axis 1). Instead, he is Axis 2, and Axis 2 people are not really crazy. Axis 2 people are sick, and the distinction is important. Instead of being crazy, there is something wrong with their souls. They are in a sense sick in their souls, what I call soul-sick. And of course that’s why Axis 2 is so hard to fix. It’s hard to cure a sick soul. How do you fix a problem that involves the individual at their basic core essence?

He refuses to take medication, but once again he is onto something because he’s not crazy in the sense that needs medication (Axis 1). He says he doesn’t need pills and in a way he is correct. Pills often do not work well for Axis 2 anyway.

He spent much of the last year in therapy but did not appear to get a lot done. Once again typical Axis 2. However, he is aware enough to go to therapy apparently on his own, which is excellent for an Axis 2 person. Perhaps because the person has only traits and not a full Axis 2 disorder is what drives him into therapy or even makes him think there is anything wrong with him in the first place. Both are quite uncommon in  Axis 2 people, and the presence of these good signs is an excellent sign that this person can actually make  progress with his Axis 2 stuff.

On the other hand, the last sentence that says he will not take it well if you imply that he is doing anything wrong does not bode well for therapy. Guess what is going to happen to him in therapy? The therapist is going to tell him he is doing things wrong. He will be told this over and over, and oftentimes the therapist will not be very nice about it. If you can’t handle criticism, therapy is a waste of time. However, he did spend most of last year in therapy, so it seems that he sticks out therapy even though he does not like being criticized.

Schizoid PD: Absolutely not.

Schizotypal PD: I have a hard time seeing any symptoms of this. I do not why people think this is the problem.

Avoidant  PD: This is where the problem lies. See detailed explanation below.

There is avoidant behavior littered all through this history starting all the way back in childhood. He gets insulted once, and he won’t talk to the person for a year. Someone criticizes him, and he walks out of the room and out of the person’s life. He doesn’t care about losing a lot of friends, possibly because he would rather push them away anyway. He engages in abrasive and hostile behavior towards friends in order to deliberately drive them away, possibly because he thinks they are getting too close to him. This is a clear case of pushing people away, and pushing people away is classic avoidant behavior.

As noted above, the last sentence here does not bode well and is a classic sign of avoidant behavior. Of course Avoidants don’t take criticism well. That is the core of the whole issue with them.

On the other hand, a true Avoidant PD would probably just get up and walk out of the office as soon as he gets criticized. I had a therapist once (yep I have been on both sides of the fence here) told me that he had had ~7 Avoidants in his time as a therapist.  With every single one of them with not a single exception, as soon as the he criticized the person, the person got a very hurt expression on their face, gathered up their stuff, and walked right out of the office never to return. It’s interesting that he saw the exact same thing in 7 different cases over years, but believe or not, a lot of DSM conditions act like this. It’s almost as if the people with the condition were all reading off the same script, as I call it.

There are also classic signs of low self esteem going all the way back to youth. The symptoms of low self-esteem occur over and over again in this history. Of course, low self-esteem in not in the DSM yet, though I they are probably working on it. Not all psychological problems get a DSM diagnosis. That’s the thing. It is possible to have all sorts of  psychological issues without having a single diagnosable DSM condition. Which of course makes sense as almost all of us are at least a bit unhealthy, are personality disordered in at least a slight way, and are at least a little bit weird and crazy if not perverted on top of that. In other words, humans are very fallible creatures, we are not perfect, and life is full of all sorts of  problems even for the healthiest people.

Low self-esteem might go away with pills, but he is a bit too old for that. Much better reactions are seen with adolescents because the low self-esteem has not cemented itself in yet.

Of all of the issues I have worked with in counseling, the two hardest were Major Depression and low self-esteem. I have tried everything and I cannot seem to get low self esteem to budge. I have seen some folks improve in the issue, but they tend to still have the problem to a lesser extent. For some reason low self esteem seems to get cemented in very hard in the brain such that it is quite difficult to turn around. The best results are seen in childhood and especially adolescence before the personality is fully formed.

Therefore, the diagnosis is:

Axis 1: Deferred, a secondary problem to the Axis 2 problem if it is there at all.

Axis 2: Avoidant PD: Avoidant traits, but does not meet criteria for the full disorder.

Other issues: Chronic low self-esteem dating back decades.

Note: The two problems are feeding into each other in an endless feedback loop, as you  might notice if you read the history carefully. You cannot really defeat one of the two conditions above. The stool is being held up with four legs of the chair. You cannot just take out one leg – you will have to take out two legs to make the chair crash down.


Hi there,

My mother and I have been arguing about this for 15 years or more. I’m 37 and have been sober with the help of AA – off of marijuana daily, hard alcohol weekly, and LSD monthly – sober for more than 11 years now.

I had a girlfriend in high school for 2 or 3 years. I had many friends through early grade school or partying, and we had much fun while also sharing time and feelings…and sometimes we hurt each other. My mother was also very supportive then (and still is, but can also be hurtful on purpose). Pretty normal stuff, but I can remember being avoidant. If someone did one certain thing to piss me off, I might’ve not spoken to them for half a year.

Eventually, at the end if my drug and alcohol abuse, I had managed to alienate or avoid all but one or two drug-using buddies that needed as much of a an illegal head change as me. I was verbally abused as a kid; they had gotten worse.

In sobriety, I’ve had a couple sexual encounters but only one girlfriend, and we lasted maybe 4 months. She was beautiful and looked 30, my age, but she was 42, wanted me to impregnate her, and started suggesting we go to therapy. 4 months was both too little and too much for me.

I also can make friends but I don’t always keep them. I’ve helped people in AA and they’ve helped me, but after all this time, I get pissed if they start to even think about providing help without my asking. Sometimes they think there are things wrong with me, and that’s fine, but if they start basing their decisions on their hack “diagnoses” of me, I might never call them or go to the same meeting as them.

I basically want people to be my friend, and thats it; I’ve been known to want to make people laugh for an hour or more, and this makes me very happy inside. It’s something I was able to do for people when I was young and in high school. If someone gives me a compliment or tells me I’ve accomplished certain things in my life, I shrug it off. It means not much to me; I don’t feel that’s what’s important in life, your accomplishments.

I’ve recently found peace in Zen writing with some practice, studying the writing of Shinryu Sazuki. I don’t talk bad about other people’s beliefs but really find other religions to be silly in practice, and have never believed in a higher power, instead simply practicing that I don’t have the power, any power, not much power – changing the things I can.

I think part of my problem is my mother. If I had a bad week – maybe any week during the past 15 years – she often thought and sometimes said I needed to be diagnosed with a problem, leading to many arguments, some with me even admitting that I had a clinical problem. She keeps pushing the psychiatric drugs, which ill never take (Never; please hear that if you want to reply and actually help).

What’s most hurtful is I create a boundary, yet even when I have a good day (exercise, meditation, doing good things for myself), I can’t trust her to actively cross that boundary and talk about me in a manner, suggesting I can’t cope, that I make mistakes that exhibit avoidant or schizotypal behavior, and generally, her not letting me live my own life…crazy and fucked up or not…

I care that she is more healthy and lives longer and stops having medical issues, but she has been 300 lbs or more – obese – for 20 years or more. I never diagnose her or tell her she is making bad decisions. I don’t give her advice unless she specifically asks. It’s simply a boundary I respect. It’s common decency. I don’t talk about her problems because I learned early on that it was rude and disrespectful.

I could change my perception of her, but its awfully hard when she does this. What worked is I hardly talked with her for a couple years until she did Alanon work of her own avail and started being enjoyable.

Most recently, we’ve gone back to Square One. For 5 years I trimmed trees, netting thousands before 2008. Then I worked as a office person/driller for my father the next 5 years. We’ve gone out of business, so I’m putting a sleeper on my truck while hauling a motorcycle. Me and the two dogs are gonna hoof it. I have some starter money from selling a house back to my parents, so it’s not the craziest.

At the same time, my parents and some other people have decided to reassert the opinion that I have a “condition” and that my decision- making is screwy. I care about their happiness, but they thinking I can’t have a happy life unless I am actively coping with some mental condition and that it deserves pills, it’s crazy to me when they want to relate the opinion on any given day we spend time with each other.

I also recently dropped a class (not a great sign of progress). While moving out of my house and getting rid of nearly every possession I’d collected the past three decades, selling off $500K worth of drilling equipment to pay off a bank and getting over my workaholic father (a perfect example…which is bad… which is another story) and I not succeeding together professionally – I decided to take two journalism classes at the college. I had to drop both.

There I made one friend, quirky, with whom I spent many hours with at the lab portion talking, bullshitting, and working together. I also made a fool of myself with a couple other people. I got in trouble (embarrassing when you’re 30 something) for writing joke, fake stories on the board. Yelled at another student to make people laugh. Was nervous and self-conscious.

I was scared half the time I had done something wrong to somebody, and the dean was gonna come in and kick me off campus or something. I also managed to meet deadlines and publish two stories. It really was too much for me at the time, so I had to drop what I could, school being something that will always be there.

My father was mad when I enrolled that I didn’t advance my AA in BA and chose to go back to the community college, but I just laughed at him and his preferences for me. Journalism has always been a dream of mine and I plan to take more courses. I got a taste for interviewing people and investigating facts and opinions; it looks like another trade for me.

When I’m at my worst, I don’t do anything. I hole up inside of my home and fail to even start my day. I understand this writing here has been about much else, but my problems can be serious. Oftentimes I’m worried about my appearance or cleanliness. Do they know I masturbate too much? are they gonna notice my fingernails are dirty? Worse off, if they knew I was thinking these things, it’d be worse. This thinking leads me to not going out into the world or hard to be around – to where I make no friends, no connections.

Oftentimes a girl working at a store or somewhere will be nice to me. I’m actually kinda good looking…although I wear overalls 6 days a week for the past 5 or 10 years.) I go home and obsess about her, dream about her. Until either way, I cant go back to that store.

I feel disgusting and have bad thoughts. Is she the right one? Am I disgusting? Do they just want my money anyhow? I’m a shitty person? If I just want to get into bed with them, they’ll know, and that’s hurtful. But if I really think she’s smart and we could get married, there’s something wrong with her. She smokes. Something. I’ll find some reason to not go to that store for a year, maybe more.

Am I just an asshole. If I can’t be in a simple moment with people…I am some sort of asshole.

I usually make friends or closer acquaintance with thinkers or people who are quirky. Most often they are 20 years older than me – teachers at my college or mentors in and out of AA but often out. As I start this new adventure, my experience with relationships is two sided; I’ve kept in touch with none of these older or quirky persons, and I’m sick of being around my parents and them taking care of me. I’m leaving town, and I want to get better at leaving town.

One big deal that happened recently is I saved up a bunch of angst about my neighbor (and other things in my life) and yelled at him for 5 minutes so the whole neighborhood could hear me. He was gone, and I was still in my garage scream epithets. We were surprised he didn’t press some kind of charges. But I didn’t directly threaten him so…

Another thing…my mother can do and say things while just sitting in a room that can make me want to strangle myself. I think its part of my condition or general person, and sometimes the way people breathe or move just irks me. I have to leave the room.

Some people bother me, while others don’t. So my solution is simply to only go places and be around people I like. Sometimes this isn’t enough for me – I cant find anywhere or anyone. And this worries my parents. A bad day of mine is reason for me to have medication for them.

When I started going back to meetings 6 months ago, it helped. I find some peace there. Most recently I made a friend then lost him because he wouldn’t call or text me back. I said I forgave him but didn’t really want to try again. I was also worried about what he thought of me, and I hated him for it. Sometimes I think this is normal but it’s also a little obsessive.

When I go to meetings, I feel better. Things that were a big deal become small deals. The problem is the getting there. Its like working out for most; they just need to go, then they feel great. But getting off the couch and to the gym isn’t exactly as important as being able to get along in public situations or meetings, which I definitely have trouble with.

I guess my dilemma is the same as it was 5 years ago. I exhibit a good deal of avoidant or schizotypal behavior but refuse medication. I talked with a therapist for many of the weeks of last year, and he gave me some tools I didn’t have. Mainly they want me to care more about other people or to develop, maintain or exhibit lasting connections with other people.

It takes much exercise and a routine including morning reading to get me to where I can relax and be happy around people besides myself, to where I can appreciate other people or not be scared of what they are thinking of me.

They also say I’m excellent at guitar. Because it’s not a possession but something I can share for free with others. I like playing for them but don’t really care if they like me as a person, and I sometimes put my foot in my mouth, saying or doing things that will drive them away…It’s not always, but I sometimes have no control…And then I just don’t give a shit, it’s freeing that they’ve left me to me. This is the other part of my behavior that’s acceptable to me but not very many others.

Ive tried herbal supplements…and they actually intensify feelings of doom, embarrassment, depression… leading to further or deeper anxiety. Strange, ain’t it?

Sorry for any length above. I value your thoughts, suggestions, experience, and advice outside of medication.

If you want to tell me I’m wrong in any way, I may react very poorly.


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Filed under Mental Illness, Personality Disorders, Psychology, Psychopathology, Psychotherapy

In Praise of Transphobia


Up with transphobia!

Transphobia FTW!

Get lost, freaks! Weirdos out!

Get help deviants! There’s no shame in mental illness. A mental health clinician is only a phone call away. Fight stigma now!


Filed under Cultural Marxists, Gender Studies, Humor, Mental Illness, Psychology, Scum, Sex, Weirdos

Is It Illegal for a Person to Have a List of People They Want to Kill?

My answer to this question on Quora:

It depends. In most cases, absolutely nothing whatsoever happens.

It is 100% legal to be a dangerous person in America. Of course there are limits to how dangerous you can be, and if you cross those limits, you can be arrested or committed, but it’s quite common for very dangerous people to walk around for years or even decades acting dangerous and appearing dangerous to most who know them, and nothing at all can be done about them.

Do you realize how many people told their friends that they were the Green River Killer. One man who did was an attorney. They were all lying, but some of them were investigated by the police. If you claim to be a famous uncaught serial killer and the police find out, they may well investigate you or put you on their suspect list.

In the course of the Green River case, some of the men who were investigated had made statements that they hated prostitutes and wanted to kill them or fantasized about killing them. All of these men turned out to be innocent.

There are quite a few people who the police believe are highly dangerous. The police say, “We have to watch him all the time.” Police departments have many dangerous-type people under fairly regular surveillance. It is 100% legal to do so.

For instance, people go into therapists officers or police stations on a fairly regular basis and say that they have fantasies about killing people in some particular way and they are really afraid that they are going to act on them. No one can do anything about it. The police can’t hold them. The therapist cannot commit them. The therapist need not contact the police, or even if he did, the police could not do much.

You can even tell a therapist, “I feel like killing people,” or “I have fantasies about killing people.” They can’t do a thing about it in terms of committing you. Sure, they could contact the police but the police might just hang up on them because they hear this sort of thing all the time.

My personal feeling, which I cannot prove, is that for every one nut running around killing people, there are 10-100 (mostly men) who only dream of it. Most people have more controls than you think. Quite a few people have dangerous fantasies, but many do not wish to carry them out for various reasons. Often they do not want to go to prison. Others say that they like to think about it but could never actually do it because it is immoral. Others say they “don’t have it in them” to do it. Others say that the reaction of friends and family and the destruction of their reputation is enough to stop them.

I am aware of one case of a man who was hospitalized merely on the basis of murderous fantasies of being a serial killer. The man was bipolar and was in the midst of a manic episode and he was in therapy. He told the therapist that he was planning on going on a serial killing episode. He had a list of people he was going to kill along with extensive notes on how he was going to do it. He had been following these people around and surveilling them and had learned their daily schedules down to the finest grain. In addition, he had already assembled a “murder kit.” Many killers have these kits. It consists of all of the implements they are going to need to carry out their kills.

Based on his extensive preparations and lists of specific people he intended to kill, his extensive written plotting and especially his kit, this was considered specific enough to make a commitment on the basis of dangerousness.

He was hospitalized for 1.5 years and his bipolar disorder was treated. At the end of the period, he was 100% cured and his homicidal ideation was gone. The patient thought the killing plans were due to his mania.

In general according to the Tarsakoff Rule, a therapist has a duty to warn if a person is making specific threats against another person. The therapist must warn that person that the client is threatening to kill them. To get committed, it is much harder. You not only have to threaten someone, but you also have to threaten a specific person and you have do say you are going to do it. “I’m going to kill Bill Jones.” It has to be about that definite and specific. It is lacks that definiteness or specificity, the person is not commitable.


Filed under Crime, Law, Law enforcement, Mental Illness, Psychology, Psychopathology, Psychotherapy, Serial Killers

Cultural Left Self-Description Found on the Net

Found on the Net:

I’m an autistic, depressed, histrionic and narcissistic transmisogyny-affected nonbinary person of color.

I am serious. People are actually running around saying things like this? Incredible. It’s getting to where this sort of self-description is almost normal.

Now I do not mind mentally ill people talking about their issues, but you usually do not announce such things to everyone in the room. I have a mental disorder myself, and I even take meds for it, but almost no one knows about it because I never tell anyone. Why? Because when I do, I usually get a negative reaction.

And why would someone announce that they had personality disorders? Unfortunately, Axis 2 types and their fellow travelers such as High-Conflict Women are everywhere, especially nowadays, but they generally don’t go around telling people about it. In particular, chaotic and dramatic Cluster B types like this person almost always deny that they have the problem, and of course they never want to fix it.

And why do people go around announcing that they are depressed? What’s the point of that? I’ve experienced it myself, but depression used to be something you were ashamed of. In fact, mild depressives typically deny being depressed, often angrily. Are there that many chronic, treatment resistant depressives out there that “Depressed” becomes part of your actual identity? That’s not healthy.

I work in mental health. Almost all of the people I work with have anxiety disorders and quite a few are also depressed. I advise people to acknowledge that they have a mental disorder.

On the other hand, I do not think that people should become their disorder.



Filed under Cultural Marxists, Depression, Mental Illness, Mood Disorders, Personality Disorders, Psychology, Psychopathology