Category Archives: Gender Studies

Masculinity As Performance Art

I think if gay men acted masculine, a lot more of us straight guys would like them, but on the other hand, it would be very hard to tell us from them, and I’m not sure that’s a good thing. I think a lot of what we don’t like about gay men is the non-masculine behavior. I would think that a hypermasculine gay man, even around these parts, might even be accepted as long as he shut up about his sexual orientation. He’d be “one of the boys,” albeit with some weird sex stuff going on, but I think a lot might forgive him.

Masculinity in the US is mostly about performance art anyway. It’s about walking the walk and talking the talk. You do that and you’re masculine, pretty much. If you are not masculine in some other way(s), they will blow it off as long as you do the display properly. Anyway, most men who go through the trouble of acting overtly masculine usually think of themselves as masculine and try to act that way in quite a few other ways too.

And in a sense, if you think you’re masculine, you’re masculine. I said that to my father once and he got very angry. I had another friend who derided guys who were “trying to be men.” But the whole concept is stupid. If you’re trying to be a man/masculine, then you are a man/masculine. That’s because masculinity is performance and if you are attempting the performance, you are no doubt performing it.

That’s because any man who thinks he’s masculine is going to act masculine, de facto. No one thinks they are masculine and then acts unmasculine. I’ve known quite a few unmasculine straight guys (some of whom were notorious womanizers) and they openly admitted that they were not masculine men. It tended to cause problems with their girlfriends too, of course.

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Filed under Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Man World, Sex

I Guess All World War Two Generation Males Must Be Toxic

My father wasn’t really an alpha but he thought he was like so many other men. He also wasn’t that extroverted but he thought he was once again like so many other introverts. He had problems speaking on the phone for Chrissake, often collapsing into pathetically amusing stutters. I’m not sure I ever saw him speak to a group. I doubt if he would do well.

He was a teacher though, and I once saw him teach a class. A very good female friend of mine was a student in one of his classes at the college I attended in the day and he taught at night. One night I attended one of his classes. There he was, swimming freely in his own element, quite at home and very pleasant and even stunning to behold. As is so often the case, he was a completely different person roaming about at the head of his class than he was away from the blackboard. He was actually charming up there. He was nothing like that at home. You would have thought they had switched him out.

He was a beta introvert, an intellectual who even at the end of his life was inhaling a book a day. He wore glasses. He taught school. He was a prig with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. You get the picture.

Yet my father very much valued masculinity as a concept. I once asked my mother why she didn’t call him on some particular aspect of his behavior.

“Oh…” she whispered. “I’m afraid he would see it as an attack on his masculinity and I would never do that to him.”

She would never attack his masculinity. Incredible. Can you imagine a woman of my generation (Baby boomers) ever saying she would not dare attacking her man’s masculinity? What ever happened to later generations of women? Didn’t they get the memo? Actually, I am afraid that what happened was a brain toxin called feminism.

My father despised gay men and mostly saw them as incomprehensible freaks if not mentally ill unfortunates to be pitied at best.

He hated his long hair more than anything else. My father felt that long hair on men was effeminate. As a boy, his mother had grown his hair long and even dressed him up in dresses around the house. At some point as a young boy, he rebelled against this nonsense and demanded to be treated like a man.

He later demanded that his formal first name be reduced to the more macho sounding nickname. He was quite proud of this form of rebellion against the strictures of imposed familial culture.

He took macho jobs in the summer working at Yosemite National Park, where he met my mother, or even working in supermarkets. I remember once visiting a supermarket and there was my bespectacled schoolteacher father, tossing and catching watermelons like they were tennis balls.

When my mother first went to work in 1980, my father objected. He was raised that a good man should not allow his wife to work. If your wife worked, that meant you were a failure as a man because you were failing to earn enough money to support your family. Your wife taking a job was a form of emasculation.

As you can see, my father took great importance in masculinity, as did many men of his generation. However, the Cultural Left seems to deny that things like masculinity and femininity even exist, God forbid that they may be essentialized by Nature.


Filed under Cultural Marxists, Feminism, Gender Studies, Left, Man World, Scum

Masculinity Studies, Yet another Abomination of the Cultural Left

The Cultural Left can’t even agree if masculinity exists or not. On the one hand, it is another one of these “constructed categories” that exist only in minds and not in realis. On the other hand, it exists, but it is evil, referred to as always “toxic” and in need of eradication along with those wicked other constructed qualities like race and gender, which also exist only mentally and ephemerally and not materially.

And even if it does exist, masculinity is apparently evil. All masculinity is “toxic masculinity.” There’s no other kind.

The war on masculinity is led of course by the feminists, who have always hated the masculinity and sexuality of normal heterosexual men. That masculinity exists at all indicates that it is oppressive. In fact, these things cannot exist at all without being oppressive.

It’s little remarked that the gays also wage war on masculinity, a concept along with gender that they despise. Of course gay men hate gender – most of them are men who act like women! And of course they hate masculinity – because so many of them are men who are very unmasculine. The very concept of masculinity at all would seen to be homophobic, and gays online routinely refer to masculinity as toxic.

The fact that masculinity or its caricature at least exists in spades on gay culture would seem to be lost on them. Who are these tops anyway? What’s a bear? What’s with these hard-looking stern-faced leathermen with other men on leashes. More cognitive dissonance or in this case cognitive blindness.

You would think that lesbians who typically act masculine like men would take up the banner of masculinity, but they just don’t. In fact, to suggest that lesbians are masculine is heresy – it is considered to be de facto homophobic and hate speech.

In this case as in so many others with the Cultural Left, truth becomes vicious insult on account of its revelations being unpalatable. The Cultural Left believes that if truths are ugly, then this means that they are not true! An interesting form of philosophy to say the least.

Our universities now have entire fields of studies devoted to “Masculinities.” There are even journals about these manly things, which are always bizarrely pluralized. At first I thought they were onto something as I have a bit of a hard-on for masculinity myself, at least in my own mind and self-image. I’d love to see some real scholarship on the concept of masculinity and how it manifests in the individual and society across classes, races and cultures.

I dipped into it and was quite disappointed. Everyone writing in “Masculinity Studies” is either an insane feminist or a gay man. The entire field is devoted to waging war on the very concept of masculinity and sees its very existence as permanently pathological.


Filed under Cultural Marxists, Feminism, Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Higher Education, Homosexuality, Left, Man World, Radical Feminists, Scum, Sex

Boot Camp Boyhood Redux

Shi: Did I miss out on an important rite of passage because I never really got bullied in childhood, school, college or employment?

Probably early on as a child I learned that you should never let people walk over you. As a schoolboy, I would get into plenty of brawls in the playground or after school. Ugly ones which often led to a bloody nose. Medically, I was considered unfit. That didn’t stop me from enjoying a decent fight. I loved fights…

I never failed standing up to bullies and even older boys. They would completely whoop my ass but I still enjoyed the adrenaline rush. Sometimes it would hurt so much that I couldn’t walk straight for a few days. We’re talking about mid-90s in India. I prided myself for being a little warrior who would fight till the death when needed, even when the odds are against him. The onlookers had to always split the fights out of fear for my life. But back down. Never!

I’d say I just got lucky. Had I been raised in a really violent environment, say around African-American kids, it could have led to an early obituary.

Only in 7th grade I learned that it’s not OK to engage in physical confrontations to settle disagreements. This made perfect sense, as by then I was old enough to understand that a juvenile prison isn’t a pretty place.

Even though I magically became nonviolent (much to the relief of my parents), that streak of aggression never disappeared. Every time somebody pushed me around, I would play dirty to defend myself. Screaming and yelling never got out of my system.

1- High school/college — Almost no hazing. I never respected any seniors who were being “playful”. It was supposed to be a rite of passage where you address your seniors as “sir” and be obsequious. I never understood it. They left me alone.

I did have a hard time in engineering college when I was sharing an apartment with a bunch of aggro co-students. All of them were violent sociopathic types. We fought sometimes but were mostly friends. Out of all the seven roommates, I endured physical violence with only two. Can’t call that hazing, as we were in the same class.

2- Workplace — Worked under many a sadistic boss. I do have a tendency to only care about the top bosses, and ignore immediate supervisors. That probably saved me the day-to-day grief. No fear = No bullying — Yes, I’ve been kicked out of a few jobs. But mostly I was the one who went ahead with the resignation.

Just to add in a summary. I’m not a violent person, but I do have a violent streak that might intimidate a few people. Especially women. I’ve hit my girlfriends a few times in the past, but I regret it now. I don’t hit women anymore. Really that phase is over.

I’m 35. Somewhere there is this uncontrollable rage left within me but by now, I have learned how to bottle it up.

Moral of the story: Kids should get into fights. When they grow up, they will not fear anyone.

I love this comment. Thanks so much. The commenters on here are all saying they never bullied anyone as children, bullying is terrible, bla bla. Come on! Teasing, taunting, tormenting, challenging, instigating and fighting are normal behavior in young boys. It’s just what they do.

Did you ever bully, taunt, torment, tease, or instigate a fight with any other boys? Damn, we sure did. There were three boys in our family and we fought all the time! It was great!

And we had rock clod wars and berry wars even with our best friends and cousins. These would sometimes end in wild fights, each side would be screaming, “We’re going to kill you!” I remember one time my cousins and my brothers and I got into a berry war up at their house. It was right before we were going home on the plane. All I remember was my Mom gathering us up for the trip to the airport as our we and our cousins were yelling that we were going to kill each other. My Mom was a bit beside herself.

I asked my Mom about bullying, taunting, teasing, instigating and fighting among boys the other day. She shrugged her shoulders and said you can’t stop it, and boys will always be this way. Just try to break up the bad fights, make sure they don’t seriously hurt or kill each other and try to protect the weaker ones. Her attitude was that it was not a good thing but that there was no way to stop it and it was going to go on forever, as it’s natural and normal behavior among boys to fight.

Come to think of it, my friends and I never engaged in much bullying. It was more taunting and teasing in order to instigate or try to provoke a fight. We would run up to the victim and call him names in an effort to provoke a response out of him. If he responded, we would either beat him up, fight him,  or run away.

There is a cruel sort of bullying where a group of boys gang up on another boy or girl and commit acts of aggression or violence against them. Throwing them up against the lockers, knocking their books out of their hands, stealing their stuff, spitting on them, punching or kicking them. That’s just violence. I can’t remember doing that too much as a boy. There were boys who engaged in this sort of physically violent bullying even up to high school, but they were sociopathic, violent, often criminal types who also committed crimes like burglary, drug dealing, vandalism, etc.

I did support the bullying or better yet, taunting and teasing of severe outliers because their behavior is so bizarre and off that it’s just not acceptable. They need to get the message and learn! Severely effeminate boys, crybabies, profoundly bizarre and nerdy boys, and dangerous, disturbed and psycho boys will never be accepted by other boys because their behavior is so strange and aberrant. My experience has been that a lot of those boys get bullied for their aberrant behavior, and at some point, they knock it off and act normal.

I realize that kids do gang up on kids who are relatively normal. I don’t support bullying any normal kid for being fat, skinny, redheaded, wearing glasses, or whatever. There’s nothing wrong with a kid like that, so there’s no object lesson to be gained in bullying him. It’s just cruelty.

Furthermore, I am aware that the severe, physical and sociopathic type of bullying often damages people far into adulthood. I can’t support such a thing.

This is what I meant when I said that boyhood was boot camp for manhood. The purpose of boyhood is to make a man out of a boy. It tends to be a rather cruel, brutal, and often violent project with a lot of psychological and even physical aggression.

If you make it through boot camp,  you come out a hardened Marine. If you bomb out of boot camp, you don’t come out a Marine.

In the same way, if you make it through boyhood, you come out a hardened and hopefully masculine man. That’s the purpose of boyhood – to create not just men but hardened, masculine, and tough men who can handle rough circumstances without running away or bursting into tears. There are a lot of boys who don’t seem to make it through Boot Camp Boyhood well. They don’t emerge toughened; instead, they come out damaged. This is sad, but this is how life is. Life is a series of trial by fire episodes. They’re often Hellish, but you are supposed to make it through more or less intact. At the end of each of these tests, you are supposed to be a bit stronger and tougher than before.

I do agree with protecting weak, relatively normal boys and girls from bullying.  There’s nothing wrong with them anyway, so there’s no lesson to learn from the bullying. It’s just cruelty, and it can cause a lot of damage, not only in youth but later on, far off into adulthood. I know adults who are 35 years old and are still suffering the effects of childhood bullying. The most common effect that I have seen from childhood bullying is chronic low self-esteem in adulthood. These are often very nice people, but I would be lying if I said it was an easy problem to fix. I’ve had a harder time fixing chronic low self-esteem than just about anything else. It’s like it got pounded in their brains with concrete.


Filed under Gender Studies, Man World, Psychology, Psychopathology

Poles and Holes Redux


RL: “A hole only works with a pole, otherwise it’s like a hole in the ground, just sitting there being useless with nothing to fill it up waiting for you to trip over it.”

Is this how you view women?? 😂

As a woman though I feel this way a lot I don’t know if it’s a confidence thing or a society thing. Robert what do you think…?

Actually, I don’t view women that way. I don’t consider a vagina with no penis to put in it to be a useless object. On the other hand though, for gay men…

Believe it or not, I actually wrote that about gay male sexuality. Obviously a society of gay male bottoms ain’t going to work out very well. I doubt if there’s going to be much sex going on.

“A hole needs a pole, and a pole needs a hole” is actually a pretty good way of viewing heterosexual sexuality, especially from the point of view of the poles (the men). Men will literally fuck anything, and I do mean anything. This is the dirty little secret about men. It’s why straight men have sex with men, why men who have no interest in kids screw little girls, why men who have no interest in animals screw animals, etc. A lot of younger women can’t seem to figure this out, but most older women get it. If as a woman, you learn one thing about men in your life, it should be this at least: men will literally fuck anything. Until you understand that, you will never figure us out.

As far as a hole needs a pole, hmmm, a lot of women do like to get fucked though for whatever reason. There’s something special about that act even though it often doesn’t lead to orgasm (only 20-25% of women regularly orgasm from intercourse). Not being a woman and never being fucked, I don’t know what that is.

I am not sure what your statement means. Do you mean that you feel useless without a man?

Tell you what. I have talked to women of all ages all over the world for some time now and some of my best friends have been women (I mean we text back and forth all day long for months), and I keep running into this: the most important thing in any woman’s life is to get a man, to have a man in her life.

For many women, literally their entire lives revolve around getting a man, their relationships with men, etc. Some of these women had very bad experiences with men, and I wondered why getting a man or having a man was so damned important to them, but it was. I actually started thinking  that maybe this was some deeply ingrained thing in human females: the need to have a man. I asked the smartest woman on Earth (my Mom) about it, and she agreed with me that for many women, one of the most important aspects of their lives revolves around getting or having a man.  We talked a bit about why this is, but we couldn’t come up with an answer.

I doubt if it is confidence thing.

Like that hole in the ground is rather useless and even a hazard with nothing to fill it up, a woman is a bit of a loose wheel without a man or men. There’s something missing. There’s a void there. It’s not so much that you lack confidence to live without a man but more that without a man something basic is missing in your existence and you feel an empitness (recall the previous metaphor) and you need something to “fill the hole” in your life.

Relax. You’re normal!


Filed under Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Psychology, Romantic Relationships, Sane Pro-Woman, Sex, Women

Bullying as Social Correction: Society Will Never Stop Giving You Negative Feedback about Your Unacceptable Behavior

Beauregard: Again, is social control always good?

Most people think a commie like yourself is something society shouldn’t tolerate, and you should hence get the shit beat out of you until you change.

Only young kids should be able to do this (within reason). Beyond that it’s dangerous. It’s a bad precedent.

I don’t understand you guys. You guys never fought as boys? You never teased, picked on and bullied each other? When most everyone was bullying of the severe outliers for being radically unacceptable, you never joined in? You never bullied one of the designated victims? I thought all boys did this sort of thing.


Bullying pretty much ends by high school. There’s not a lot in high school and especially after high school.

But I tell you what. I can think of about 15,000 different ways I could act when I walk into the store that people would not like. When I go to the counter, there’s 50,000 things I could say that will not go over well. Those are your social rules.

If you are still an autist idiot as an adult, no one will bully you, but you will get endless messages that you are not ok, which is correct.

If I go into my local stores and act effeminate, I will get a hostile response. The guys that know me will first tell me to knock it off. Then they will ignore me. If I hit on the guys I know homosexually, boy, will that get a hostile response. I might get it! And I will fully deserve it.

If I burst into tears in public, I guarantee people will become hostile. Even if I look like I am on the verge of tears, a lot of people, especially women, will not like it.

If I go around looking psycho, people will blow me off, return hostility towards me, or act suspicious of me. I will constantly get the message that my behavior is not ok, which is proper.

Society never stops giving you messages about your behavior. Even my local culture here in this barrio has a lot of pretty complicated rules I have to follow. If I don’t follow them, rejection will soon follow. If I don’t follow some of them, I might even get hit! It’s pretty easy to get hit around here. Day to day functioning around here is in part a continuous effort to keep from getting hit. Hence respect everywhere you go, and don’t diss people.

What boys are doing is that same thing. They are just being cruder about it and more physical.

Of course adults can’t bully adults, and they should not. Where adults bully adults, it often looks pretty ugly.

But Antifa says fascists need to get hit just like boys say crybabies need to get hit. It’s the same mindset. Antifa feels that fascism is so dangerous that the only response is a “wake up call” in terms of a fist. Antifa is telling fascists that they are not acceptable. Is it ok for Antifa to “bully” fascists?


Filed under Gender Studies, Man World, Sociology

Boyhood is Boot Camp for Manhood: The Benefits and Drawbacks of Bullying among Boys (1st – 8th Grade)

Justin Y: I don’t advocate bullying to the extreme Robert does. I’m just saying bullying is necessary to mold good character of some kids. It’s because those kids are devoid of compassion. They need a reality check

I don’t really advocate it. But kids are going to bully. Ain’t nothing you can do about it. I and my friends and brothers did it until age 13 or so. But we bullied the “designated victims,” not just anyone. And we bullied and teased each other and  fought all the time. Damn it was great. I loved fighting all the time. It was awesome.

I told my mom about this, and I said, “Boys will always bully and fight with other boys, you can’t stop it.”

She shrugged her shoulders and said, “Sure.”

Look at the examples here.

  • My friend DN got bullied for being a crybaby wussyboy. Later he manned up. Connection? Did we beat manhood into him?
  • Look at the other guy, MD. He was the most retarded nerd dork geek autist fool in 8th grade. I met him 3 years later, and he was Joe Cool, 100% normal human. Connection? Did we beat the retarded dork out of him?

Problems of Bullying

Problem is that a lot of kids who get bullied, especially in junior high, turn into damaged adults. Whether it beats any sense into them is dubious, and some don’t deserve to get bullied. I know a lot of adults with low self esteem, and they were all seriously bullied as kids, especially in junior high. Heavy bullying for years seems to damage some people far into adulthood. So this is the downside.

I don’t know the solution.

Boys Will Never Accept Severe Outliers

You really think 10 year old boys will accept wussy crybabies among them? Hell no! They’re gonna get hit until they stop crying!

You really think 10 year old boys are going to accept 10 year old boys who act like total flaming faggots? Why should a 10 year old boy act like a flaming queer anyway? I mean a lot of men act that way, but boys? Why? Boys that age will never accept seriously effeminate boys.

You really think 13 year old boys will ever accept totally geeked out autist tard idiots? This MD was dork! Have you seen the expressions retarded people have on their faces? He had expressions like that on his face. When he fought you, he ran like a girl and tripped over his own feet. He stuck his tongue out of the side of his mouth like a damned retard. And he swung his fists like a girl. He was the Dorked Out Idiot of the Century. Boys will never accept boys who are that geeked out and tarded. Never going to happen! And MD was not “born” an autist geektard. I met him at 16 and he was normal. He had just gotten into some massively lamed out tarded behaviors, and the other boys were beating them out of him. They were beating him into normalcy. 

Don’t you understand? When boys bully those severe outliers like that, the boys are sending them a message:

“Dude! You are a retarded autist moron laughingstock! Knock it off!”

If he starts acting like a damned human, they leave him alone.

Being an autist tard is not acceptable behavior.

Likewise, when boys bully wussyboy crybabies, they are sending him a message:

“Boys don’t cry, dammit! We are going to hit you every time you cry until you quit being such a pussyboy! Understand, crybaby?”

As soon as he quits bursting into tears all the time, they leave him alone.

Wussy crybaby males who burst into tears all the time are not acceptable! Society will not tolerate crybaby men!

The lesson I got was,

“If you cry, you get hit.”

I don’t cry much as a man. Maybe I should. But my society value is “Boys don’t cry. Men don’t cry.” I got it beaten into me (psychologically but also somewhat physically) just like all the other boys. Most boys get manhood literally beaten into them. We all go through this. Boyhood is Boot Camp for Manhood.

Likewise, twisted psychos with hate and murder in their eyes who are so sick that they are attacking everyone for no reason are not acceptable!

They’re a menace, and we worry about their future. It’s not ok to be a future serial killer!

Likewise, effeminate boys are not acceptable!

Boyhood is about learning to be a man. At the very least, the other boys have to be taught that effeminate behavior will be seriously punished. The lesson I got was:

“Act effeminate, get hit!”

So I decided that no way was I going to be effeminate. To this day, I don’t think I act effeminate, but others may differ. I also despise effeminate behavior in men. It’s disgusting!

Human society has always been this way. Aberrant behavior is not tolerated, and people will try to force severe outliers to knock it off and act like normal humans act in that society.


Filed under Gender Studies, Man World, Psychology, Sociology

The Girlfriend Application


Girlfriend application.

Anything we can add here, guys?

Here’s one:

Do you have a gag reflex? Yes_____  No_____

Any more?


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Filed under Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Humor, Man World, Psychology, Romantic Relationships, Sex

Germs, The Other Newest One

I feel your body’s close to mine
I hear your breath and mine in time
I know I’m nothing but it’s you that I need
I touch your skin and it starts to feed

You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another crash

My eyes meet yours in secret glance
Our bodies locked in ancient stance
You whisper something and I know it’s good
You’re acting crazy just like I knew you would

You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another crash

Embracing my life between your thighs
We will perform in the deadly skies
Reducing my mind to endless nights
You send my dreams to their demise
Realized by your last breath …

I take your hair in to my hands
I pull it tight to fit your demands
Feel my body into yours
I Know it’s right cause that’s my soul you stir

You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another crash
You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another crash
You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another crash
You’re not the first you’re not the last
Another day another CATCH

In case you are wondering, this is about a homosexual love affair Darby had with another boy at the Hollywood Arts Free School he went to. But no matter. Naked Lunch is a great book, and Death in Venice will never be matched. Art does not abide our petty preferences. This higher calling is meant to transcend your petty prejudices. Art’s not about right and wrong. It’s about beauty, even when it’s ugly as sin.

God, I love this music. Very, very hardcore punk rock from the bowels of Los Angeles late 70’s to 1980. It’s so vicious it’s almost evil, but that’s why it’s great. Anyway I’m a bit of a Germ myself, infecting the bowels of this decaying nation.

I’m certainly contagious, good and bad. Just ask some of my exes.

No wait.

I saw these Germs maniacs in concert once at the Hong Kong Cafe. We got there and there were these angry punkers throwing bottles against the outside of the building. They glared at us, and we looked at them like, Hey not us, guys. We got inside, and we knew some of the local maniacs in there.

Diane Chin of the Alleycats was there. She really liked me one night, but she gave me 10 seconds to make a move. I didn’t do it, so she treated me like dog crap under her shoe for the rest of the night. I looked up at her wailing away on the stage. She seemed to be glaring at me. Apparently I just failed Shit Test 1, and there wasn’t going to be another.

Some of these psychobitches give you one damn chance. You need to move on them very aggressively in 10 seconds or so. You need to walk right up to her, put your arm around her, and drag her  off with that look in your eyes that says you know you’re going to do this baby, no one can turn me down. Of course that violates #metoo 101. You just committed sexual assault, sexual harassment, and sexual misconduct, and if you play your cards very carefully, you commit rape later on that night if she’s willing.

These psychobitches actually want to be more or less raped by a brutish man. They want you to walk up to them, grab them, and start kissing them like they can’t say no. They want to be dragged off by their hair like the cavemen did. They want to be told what to do and ordered around. They want the confidence of Superman and the brooding danger of Marlon Brando. If you can’t measure up, you’re a pussy, and she wants to kill you.

She wore all leather, but that doesn’t mean much. Most punker chicks were submissives deep down inside, like all normal women.

Anyway there she was.

My friend points to her and says, “See that chick there? Diane Chai of the Alleycats?”


“She’s nuts!”

I look over at her.

“Yes, I can see that.”

“When she does her slamdancing thing…”


“That chick! She…actually…breaks…tables!” His eyes are falling out of his head.

Well I knew she was a psychobitch, and now that was confirmed. I made a mental note not to impersonate any tables that night.

My friend’s sister was there along with her best friend, a perpetually scowling punker chick with leather and frizzy hair. You would think she was a dyke looking at her, but no way. She softened up and went submissive if I tried to talk to her. That means, “I like cock.” Dykes don’t to that. Dykes send in reinforcements when you try to talk to them, unless you’re gay, in which case they might like you and treat you like their little boy pet.

I went to the bathroom. There was the great Darby Crash, lead singer of the Germs! Famous! Sort of. A complete maniac! No really, read a biography. He’s all dressed in leather like a street tough. He’s got this sneering snarl that’s rather appealing if you’re a mountain lion. I’m washing up. He sees me and smiles/sneers whatever. It’s not exactly unfriendly. He’s just saying Fuck the World, and he hopes you agree. He looks like he’s  going to bust out laughing. His life was a bad joke, so he probably should have.

“Got any Tuuuuuuuuuinalssss?” He asks me with the not unfriendly James Dean sneer, a smiling laugh waiting to bust out and blow up the room.

His voice is is faggier than the Castro. He’s making limp wrist gestures. This dangerous maniac is actually a flaming faggot! What the Hell, man? The leather, the homicidal look, the deranged masculinity of a caged animal, and wrap it up with a mincing queen. It’s not even a product. It’s an April Fools Joke. Nothing about it even makes sense.

He’s asking me for Tuinols. Those are downers, barbiturates. Also called Blues. Popular back then.

Take one, and it’s like drinking a six pack.

Drink on them and you might die. Get behind a wheel, and all bets are off.

Give one to a chick, and she’ll turn into a half-conscious slavering nympho who won’t remember a thing in the morning. These pills do have their uses, you know? Girls liked to take them so they could have slutty irresponsible sex with the excuse that they were too wasted to be responsible, with the added benefit of being amnestic the next morning. Who knows what the truth is?

The thing is probably just a confession booth in a capsule. “I now absolve you of all responsiblity!” A blue excuse.

Well, I dealt drugs of course. I did for many years. And never got caught. Neener neener cops. I never sold pills though. Those are dirty and ugly. Sell them to some idiot, and he crashes into a bicyclist at night. You’re on the hook for felony murder and a guilty conscience til death no bottle can wash away.

“Nope, sorry,” I said. “Tuinal cigarettes. All I have are Tuinol cigarettes.” Well there’s no such thing. That’s an assholey thing to say, but then, Darby was an asshole, so it was probably appropriate.

“Tuinol cigarettes!?” he scoffs, realizing it’s a stupid joke. Part of him wants to hit me, and the other part wants to bust out laughing.

He starts sneering, and bursting out laughing in outrage, snarling out the door holding back the laughter.

I decided that I sort of like the guy, and now I just met a famous and very dangerous punk rock musician.

We go back to the club and buy Heinekens. My friend’s sister goes submissive, crumbles when I say hi. All the evil in her wrings out like a sponge. Now she’s a ragdoll, waiting to be taken. I get it. She wants to be raped too. All these scary punker bitches do. They’re all little girls at the end of the day.

Rape!? Well. Consensual rape. Let’s put it that way. You know, the way most mammals do it?

All you have to go is grab her like a maniac. And no, you don’t ask permission, you #metoo boneheads. Asking permission is pussy. It’s fail. A man doesn’t ask permission for anything. He takes what he wants, caveman-style.

I’m too chicken, so it’s a fail. Been listening to too many feminists. The only way to seduce her would be very roughly anyway, and that violates sexual misconduct, sexual harassment, and assault right there, with (consensual) rape later on if you get lucky. I’ve turned pussy. It’s all the fault of feminists and paying too much attention to my mother. About certain things, a man should never really listen to his mother. Listen to his father? Maybe.

The first show is Joanna Went. Apparently she’s actively psychotic or something. Her act is some sort of a schizophrenic breakdown on stage. I’m wondering if she’s really crazy or just a maniac like all the rest of these animals.

“Catatooooonic!…………Schizophreeeeenic!……..” She wails at no one and nothing. Her eyes look crazed. She’s got football player shoulder pads on like a circus freak. On a chick with pink hair. Well. That’s weird. Partway in, she starts ripping at the pads. The pads come open. They’re filled with shredded cheddar cheese! That makes perfect sense!

She’s grabbing handfuls of the cheese and throwing it out into the audience, wailing like a crazy woman the whole time. The maniacs in the audience are picking up handfuls of cheese and throwing it everywhere. Pretty soon the whole audience is caught in an actual blizzard of cheese. Like zero visibility. We are all covered with cheese. We’re pissed off, so we reach down and grab handfuls of cheese and start throwing them at Joanna. Hard. As hard as possible. That bitch. She threw cheese at us! For some reason, she likes this and smiles. She wants you to hate her. She’s trying to piss you off. It’s Duchamp and Man Ray, half a century too late. Dada, get it?

This nonsense is called Performance Art. I am not sure what the artistic statement is. Apparently that she’s crazy, we’re all crazy, and the rest of the world is nuts too. I think she could have said that without creating cheese blizzard, but it’s ok. Now I have another cool story to brag about.

The Germs come out.

There’s an air of menace in the club. It’s scary, you might get hurt. But that’s exhilarating too. Like war. The rush of impending potential violence. You’re on edge, but you’ve never been so excited.

The drummer is Don Bolles. He looks like a maniac.

The guitarist is Pat Smear. He looks like he’s criminally insane.

The bass player is this hot blond reform school runaway chick. She looks dangerous too.

Hell, they’re all dangerous. So’s the audience. That’s the general idea here. After a while, the dangerousness infects you, and you start getting antisocial yourself. I’m starting to feel pissed off. I guess that was the plan.

The band careens off into their set. This is some of the most terrifying music I’ve heard. Pure savage wailing raw animal menace. Perfect for a predatory animals like us. Apex predators. We forget that too often. We can kill everything else.

I’ve got nothing to be mad about, but I hate the world anyway. I’m not sure what the problem is, or if it’s even a problem. I want to hate the world, so maybe it’s adaptive. But why? I’m probably just not getting laid enough. But even if I was getting laid, I’d still be pissed off. I was 23 years old.

And now I’m gonna be 22!
I said a…Hey hey!
And a boo hoo!

– Iggy Pop and the Stooges, 1970


Speed jive

Don’t want to stay alive
When you’re 25

– Mott the Hoople, All the Young Dudes, 1972

You get the picture. Young men don’t need a reason to be angry.

Look back in anger.

What are you rebelling against?…What do you got?

Who knows what causes this aimless and meaningless anger of young men? It’s probably all down to testosterone poisoning.

The set’s halfway over.

Darby Crash has that same wild sneer and the 5150 look. He looks like he needs to be Baker Acted, and soon. He’s crouched down on the stage like a wild animal. Like a tiger. Or lion. Same man-eating look.

Everybody is starting to hate him. That’s the idea. Why? He’s an asshole! Just look at him! He wants you to hate him, get it? It’s not even serious. It’s a band of provocateurs.

People are throwing stuff at the stage, mostly at Darby because he deserves it most. The more people throw stuff, the more he smiles, crouches lower and screams like a man-eating feline. I’m starting to hate him. He’s really pissing me off.

We have cokes full of ice. There’s only ice left. I am grabbing handfuls of crushed ice and throwing it this freak on stage. Hard! Try to him! Hit him!

But why?

Because he’s an asshole! Just look at him.

The more ice that gets thrown at him, the more he smiles. It’s all a bit sado-masochistic. But as long as I’m dom, it’s all good.

The show crashes on until it ends, a freeway pileup in the fog on a sound stage.

We stumble out of the building.

It’s New Years Eve, 1979. Tomorrow will be a whole new decade.

The 70’s are over. Bye bye Hotel California. Bye bye paradise. Call someplace paradise, kiss it goodbye.

Hello Germs. Hello Hell. Hello Other Newest One.

It’s the end, the end of the 70’s! It’s the end, the end of the century!

We lurch out of the building and into an alleyway. A crazed, drunken man stumbles into our path. He can’t even walk. He careens nearly into us and crashes to the ground. He picks himself up and looks back at us wildly. We stop. He has granny glasses. He fell on his face, and one lens is smashed. There’s blood all over his eye. It’s Clockwork Orange and Night of the Living Dead combined. Pure horrorshow, droogies.

Maybe he’s gone blind. Who knows?

It’s horrible. There’s blood pouring out of his eye socket. He puts one hand up to his bleeding eye and lurches off ahead of, fertilizing the dawn of the new decade crimson red in his path.

It’s a whole new decade. Things are getting scary. Reagan just won. Nothing makes sense. Everyone’s pissed off and, no one knows why. A new decade looms ahead, glowing ominously with pregnant danger.

We shake our heads at the horror and the spectacle.

A whole new decade has come crashing in filth and fury. We drive home in near silence on the freeway. After all we saw, there’s no words to add. The words are sucked out of us for a good hour. We still don’t quite believe it happened, and we are trying to take it all in.

And that was the night I saw the Germs.


Filed under Art, Barbiturates, Depressants, Feminism, Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Intoxicants, Man World, Music, Punk, Rock, Sex, Women

A Pole Needs a Hole, and a Hole Needs a Pole

The title is Sex Education Lesson 1 for today.

Lin: Bob, as you said, gays are more interested in recipient rectal sex than as emitter. Just chop off the prostate gland and terminate the Lawrence of Arabia syndrome.

Yes, there is a big problem now. On their dating sites, almost all of the gay men say they are bottoms. Ok, that means they take it up the ass.

Hardly any of the men say they are tops. The tops are the insertive partners of the holes, in case you were wondering.

Well, you can’t have sex with society of bottoms. Holes just sit there. It’s like a house full of outlets with no devices to plug into them. Nothing’s going to get turned on, literally.

A hole only works with a pole, otherwise it’s like a hole in the ground, just sitting there being useless with nothing to fill it up waiting for you to trip over it.

Some gay men made Youtube videos complaining about this. They were bottoms too of course, but they were sockets in need of a plugs, and there were no plugs to be found. So no orgiastic lights get lit up.

Some of them said, “Doesn’t anyone fuck anymore?”

There have also been a lot of complaints from gay men lately about how many gay men are effeminate. A lot of gay men, even or especially the effeminate ones, like more masculine guys. The only ones who want the femmies are some tops who like to dominate them I assume. Gay men have made pleading pitches online to stop encouraging gay men to be effeminate. They have plenty of twinks, more than enough. The shortage is of bears.

Excessive girly men, all looking for a manly man, but there are few, so the sissies are stranded at the altar.

Excessive bottoms, holes waiting to be filled by the poles that never shows up.

These are the pressing issues of the day, dammit!

Well, now you know about the fascinating issues affecting gay men nowadays. Would you like some dessert with that prose meal?


Filed under Gender Studies, Homosexuality, Sex