Monthly Archives: January 2018

John Lennon “Crippled Inside”

You can shine your shoes and wear a suit
You can comb your hair and look quite cute
You can hide your face behind a smile
One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

You can wear a mask and paint your face
You can call yourself the human race
You can wear a collar and a tie
One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

Well now you know that your
Cat has nine lives
Nine lives to itself
But you only got one
And a dog’s life ain’t fun
Momma take a look outside

You can go to church and sing a hymn
You can judge me by the color of my skin
You can live a lie until you die

One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

Well now you know that your
Cat has nine lives
Nine lives to itself
But you only got one
And a dog’s life ain’t fun
Momma take a look outside

You can go to church and sing a hymn
Judge me by the color of my skin
You can live a lie until you die

One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

One thing you can’t hide
Is when you’re crippled inside

I always loved this song. It is off the second album, Imagine. It got poorer reviews than the first album, which got rave reviews. This first album was good, but I always thought Imagine was better. He really hit it out of the park with that one. God, Working Class Hero, Jealous Guy…wow! John Lennon is too much on that album. It’s as good as the late Beatles, as good as the White Album or Abbey Road. That voice, those lyrics, so much pathos and feeling. That album is almost painful to listen to – it’s months of the most intense psychotherapy jammed into 40 minutes. He packs it all in and lets it all hang out for all to see in a way that few modern musicians ever have.

This song is very good. If you want a life lesson from someone who lived it – yep, if you are seriously crippled inside – you can’t really hide it at all. No matter how hard you try,  as long as your brain/mind/psyche/whatever is a serious mess, everyone’s going to figure it out and sooner than you think too. It won’t get past a soul, and once people get alone with you, it’s one of the first things they are going to remark on – you’re fucked in the head.

If you can pull out of it and put a pretty good shield on, you can fool most people though.  Although I would argue that once that shield is on/up, you’re not all that screwed up anymore, because the purpose of the shield is to blind you to your own pain or problems and make it seem like they don’t exist. So if you blind yourself to your problems, are they still problems? Let’s call in the philosophers!

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If You Blind Yourself to Your Problems, Are They Still Your Problems?

If you blind yourself to your problems, are they still your problems? Nice little philosophical conundrum like, “If a tree falls in the woods and no one hears it, does it still make a sound?”

I think I am doing something like this. My dreams are pretty horrible, and when I am down and out, which doesn’t happen a lot but does happen sometimes, my dreams are  positively suicidal and self-annihilating pure Hell.  Then I wake up and turn the shield on and I feel (comparatively) great! And this is when I am down and out! I first realized what I was doing late last month when I went through a rather hideous depression of maybe 10 days or so.

Obviously subconsciously, I have some horrendous stuff going on – fears, terrors, and utter misery. Those dreams were as virtual of a death wish as I ever had. Then I woke up and all those terrors and horrors were gone because I put that damn shield right on. I figured out what I was doing, but it seemed like the right thing to do. Your problems are your problems, whether you blind yourself to them or not. And they don’t seem easily resolvable.

Some of my terrors that I am willing to share with you (sorry only a few, some are just too personal):

In my dreams nowadays, I am completely ugly and unwanted. I mean literally, nobody but nobody but nobody wants me. I am literally the ugliest, most attractive person on Earth. Now in meatspace, this is an issue, but I really don’t give a damn about it too much anymore as I am getting used to it. And I hardly think I am the ugliest guy on Earth. In fact, I harbor the completely delusional notion that I am still as hot as I was as a young man. Of course, it’s a total lie, but pretty lies feel good, so wear them loud and proud!

I should not talk about this, but impotence is a big theme in my dreams. Somehow, despite my ugliness, I keep hooking up with these hot young sluts (in my dreams, right?), and try as they do, they just can’t wake that sleeping beast much. He wakes up about halfway and then rolls over and goes back to sleep. Actually, things are not quite so dire in meatspace assuming anyone wants to fuck me anymore at all (dubious). Anyway, the answer to the question is no,  I am not totally impotent. But I assure you that many men my age are just that. I am heading into the Dick Flatline Era, so I have that to look forward to. Golden years my ass!

In my dreams, almost everyone hates me and most people pretty much refuse to talk to me. They talk to me for a bit, then they start getting this look like, “Damn you’re weird dude,” and they uncomfortably end the conversation. In my dreams, a lot of the time I try to talk to people, they just ignore me. Or people who know me refuse to acknowledge my presence. It’s not exactly like that in meatspace, although it’s not totally the opposite either. I’ll let you chew on that intellectual mystery meat for a bit!

But my dreams are still sort of fun. Last night I went to Turkey!

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Just Flew to Turkey Last Night

Last night I went to Turkey for a Linguistics Conference! It was only a dream, but so what! I tell you what, I definitely saved on the airfare flying there in REM time!

Anyway, let’s hear what happened!

Dream starts below for you slowpokes:

After a while, I got a pissed off call from my Mom:

“Bob! It says long distance! How much is this going to cost me? What the Hell are you doing in Turkey?”

“I dunno Mom. I didn’t sleep for 18 hours, and I thought, ‘I’m going to Turkey, dammit’,  and next thing I knew I was at the airport, waiting for my plane to Turkey, and here I am.”

“But you didn’t get any sleep! You haven’t slept for 18 hours! Did you sleep on the plane?” (Moms never change.)

“Nope. No sleep on the plane and I’ve been awake since landed. I know I’ve been up f hours, but I don’t care. That’s sort of making it more fun because I’m so sleep deprived, I can I can hardly figure out where I am or what’s going on most of the time.”

“Where did you get the money? You just spent all your money!” (Like I said, Moms never change.)

“Yeah, I dunno about that Mom. Somehow I had X dollars before I left, and now I still have X dollars. It’s like the flight didn’t even cost anything. I have no idea how that happened. I don’t get it.” (Actually I do get it. Airplane flights can be totally free in dreams. Isn’t that cool?)

What do you mean it didn’t cost anything!  That doesn’t even make sense!” (I told you they never change.)

“I have no idea, Mom. Maybe someone paid for it? Maybe the organizers paid for the ticket? I really have no idea.”

“Well, have fun!” (It sounds more like a demand than a wish, but I told you they never change.)

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Talking Heads, “Wild Life”

More great music from this all-time great band. Not sure if they kept getting better and better as that was not even really possible looking at Fear of Music, but they definitely stayed good for a while. This is from 1986, 32 years ago!

Check out the cameo by Prince at 2:17. You will be missed, my Brother! Prince is God!

N.B. Yep, John Goodman can actually sing. Incredible, isn’t it?

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Talking Heads, “Road to Nowhere”

From the 1985 album Little Creatures, which I am not familiar with. This is as good as Fear of Music (1979).

Great music! When they came on board, they bridged the 1970’s and the 1980’s. They were called early punk rock because no one could think of anything else to call them. I prefer to call them Art Fag Rock. I mean they came out of Art School, what else do you call bands that come out of a venue you like that. I actually interviewed an early LA punk rock group called the Art Fags. They were really cool! And they weren’t gay at all of course (this was 1979, remember?) although nowadays they would have to be.

I saw them in 1979 at UCLA in one of their first US performances. Oingo Boingo was there! It was great! Outdoors concert. I will have to look it up to see the date. You guys missed it. A legendary great early punk rock show at UCLA, of all places. The ghost of Jim Morrison was looking on from the second floor of the Art Building. He was smiling because his voice was still alive in the City of Night where he started it all so long ago.

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Cherchez la Femme!

Comment  of the day:

You are so damn spot on. You give women a little and I mean a little bit of freedom and power they think they are GOD!! Tell you what women, here’s a small bit of reality you don’t seem to understand. You’re not the only one with a vagina!! So hold out on your guy, and I bet he finds someone else to give it up to him.

Damn right! Put out or else, ladies! You’ve been warned!

Extra gold star for anyone who can tie the pedantic title in (somewhat obscurely and sarcastically) with the post.

+10 extra credit points if you can tell us what the title really means. I don’t mean what it really means, I mean what it really, really means.

And yeah the true meaning is sexist, but so what! All in good fun, ladies! And don’t worry, I might give you some equal time. We haven’t renounced the Fairness Doctrine here on Beyond Highbrow yet, but it sure is tempting, I gotta admit.

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Beware the Conqueror Worm!


Oh gross!

I had worms once. A  gastroenterologist doc thought maybe I had parasites and he gave me an anti-parasite medication. Well, what do you know? Next day I went to poop, and there were these wiggy white worms in the bowl. Hookworm apparently. And my chronic fatigue stuff  got dramatically better, though it reverted back to the same old same old in a couple of weeks.

I had an appointment with the doc a couple of weeks later and told him about the bowl worms and the fatigue getting a lot better and he shrugged his shoulders like it was nothing and said he thought I might have had them. I asked him if it wasn’t weird that I got them and he shrugged his shoulders again like it was nothing and he said lots of people get them. I asked him if it wasn’t hard to get them in the US, and he shrugged his shoulders like it was nothing again and said there’s lots of ways to get them.

Now compare a doctor who knows his stuff (a specialist) with who doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground (a GP ).

I really should have reached into the damn bowl and saved those darned wigglies because a few arrogant asshole physicians (Is there any other kind?) have subsequently refused to believe that I pooped those worms and insisted that I must have hallucinated. They said the only way they would believe me is if I scooped them out and put them in a jar and showed them the damned jar! Damn doctors annoy me sometimes! I saw those damn worms! And my fatigue got dramatically better. One physician suggest I must have been some weird sexual freak for getting these worms – homosexuals can sometimes get them via means you can guess at. Well, I’m not gay and I’m not even very weird in bed, especially compared these kids nowadays.

I shit those worms, dammit! I don’t care if you don’t believe me!

And no, I have no idea how I got them.

These things were not that big,  maybe the size of the smaller type of earthworms you can sometimes dig out of the ground when you are going fishing somewhere. We used to dig out white earthworms at this lake we went fishing at that were about this size. The fish went nuts over them, apparently because these were the native worms they were used to chowing on. Yes, white earthworms exist. Now there’s something new for you to Google! Oh and don’t forget to Google tapeworm and hookworm while you are at it.

PS. My father was stationed in the Pacific theater in World War 2 and I believe he got some damned infectious worm in his intestine somehow or other on Okinawa. It made him sick as Hell too.

Beware the Conqueror Worm!

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The Problem with Gay Men Is Not That They Are Gay; The Problem Is That They Are Men!

Perfectpanicky writes: “Gay men always do this, never take no for an answer, and this is why I generally refuse to deal with them anymore.”

A lot of people feel this way about STRAIGHT men….

Hi Angel. I think you are onto something here. I doubt if this is so much a gay man’s trait as it is a man’s trait in general. This is just men being men. They never stop trying to have sex with you. Gay men like men, so I guess gay men never stop trying to have sex with men and never take no for an answer. Straight men like women, so they never stop trying to have sex with women and never take no for an answer.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with gay men in this regard except that gay men are just MEN. They really are men. They are not women in men’s bodies. So many gay men act feminine so we think they are women in men’s bodies (and many tranny idiots are starting to insist that this is the case), but one thing you learn if you hang around gay men a lot is that most of these guys REALLY ARE MEN in some very important ways.

And we see here that both straight women and straight men are aggrieved at the annoying persistance of MEN PERIOD both gay and straight .

I remember complaining on boards about working in Beverly Hills and being surrounded by aggressive homosexuals back in the day. I was 24 at the time and apparently at the peak of my looks if others reactions are anything to go by. I never got any offers to be a male model except that three different times when I was exactly 24 when I got three different offers. I was also very thin: 5’11, 150. Do they like male models thin? Anyway, I practically have to pay anyone, male or female, to check me out these day after my looks got MOAB’d.

But back then it was quite another world. I had women and even teenage girls checking me out all the time. I picked up women walking right down the sidewalk in the middle of the day and stopped their cars at midnight on Saturday nite to pick them up at night. And of course I had gay men after me all the time. I would walk down the street in Beverly Hills and one gay man after another would drive by, rubbernecking me. It gave me the shivers. Every day right after 5 PM when I got off work, there was a leatherman waiting about 75 yards from my building. He watched me the whole time I was walking to my car. He creeped me out. I used to go to the window at 4:50 to look out the window and see if he was there. Every time I looked out that window, he was looking right up at my window. I always shivered and a wave of panic ran through me.

I told women about this and instead of screaming at me and calling me homophobe, many just said, “Now you know how we women feel!”

So this is what #metoo is all about. It’s not men being weird or bad or evil or misogynistic or unnaturally creepy and yucky. #Metoo is about men being men! About men being unfortunately, sadly, tragically, lamentably, men.

And this is why #metoo will fail as with all other such idiotic but well-meaning measures. #Metoo is trying to stop men from being men! Not going to work! Remember Mother Nature is always right and not only that but She bats last and you can’t fool her. You just end up having insipid and interminable wars against the resigned intransigence of Human Nature. If you have a society full of men, #metoo is a fool’s errand, sand against the tide, bailing out a leaking vessel. Knock yourselves out, but don’t expect anything to come from it. On the other hand, if you have a society full of males who all go along with #metoo, you may well have a society full of males but you sure don’t have a society full of men, and this applies to the gay men too, for they are as tragically manly in this regard also.

And so in this sense, the problem here with gay men is not that they are men but that they are men in the first place!


Filed under Feminism, Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Man World, Sane Pro-Woman, Sex, Social Problems, Sociology

How the White Working Class/Middle Class Thinks

Here is a list of some comments I lifted from White working class people on articles about Trump. It exemplifies very well the way that these people think. They are not liberals. They are conservatives and they always have been!

They like Trump because he “talks smack” like a macho, tough guy (the prototypical White working class man):

I sometimes wonder if people even share the same planet as I do. Down here in the blue collar working class world “talking smack” is a time honored tradition. So we find Trump’s tweet to Kim hilarious and on point because it is something we would say to Kim personally if we could.

Liberal and Democratic man are wussies = girls, women, pussies, wimps and fags. The Democratic Party is the party of the women, the fags and the cucks. Real men vote Republican! Also I have been in White working class bars, and they are pretty tough. They are also a bit dangerous. I have to go into a particular mindset in order to go into a bar like this and function well. I have to psych myself up for it. Last time I was in a bar like this, some psycho White working class guy stared me down and tried to start a fight with me. He was just looking to start a fight. You also might get shoved. It you get stared down or even if you get shoved, just look away or walk away. This signals your submissiveness and they will generally leave you alone if you back down.

But I really have to get my mind into “badass tough guy mode” to even walk into a place like that. I call it “latent serial killer” mindset. If I can get into my Latent Serial Killer mindset, I can usually function pretty well in these bars. It is also an extremely anti-intellectual atmosphere, so don’t even think about that.

Also: no fags! Gay men or even men who appear like that are absolutely not welcome in these establishments. I have no problem with gay men going to bars, but they are really risking it if they go to a place like this. They need to go somewhere where they can feel welcome.

That said, there are some tough, straight acting gay men who look and act exactly like other White working class men who frequent such places. A friend of mine made friends with a couple of these idiots and  went  back to their place to party with  them.  Boy was he in for a shock. He figured out the gig after a bit of denial. He told them he was straight over and over, but they spent several hours not taking no for an answer and continually  hitting on him. Gay men always do this, never take no for an answer, and this is why I generally refuse to deal with them anymore. To straight men, gay men are a plague!

The problem is you people are a bunch of wussies who would last about 10 seconds in a Midwestern working class bar.

Trump is a guy you could have a beer with in a working class bar:

I could perfectly envision Trump sitting down and having a beer with me and my pals after a hard day’s work laughing and having a good time talking smack.

See? We are pussies and fags and the working class guys would kick us out the door as soon as we opened our effete snob mouths:

You upper middle class bougie snobs would get your arses beat out the front door the moment you opened your mouth.

This is how they see us! Not only as wimps, but also as geeks and nerds. Of course, guys like that are not considered to be real men either:

You people are geeks, nerds, and feminized losers.

Trump is a “regular guy.” You hear White working class men use this phrase a lot and you need to understand what it means. Fags, pussies, wimps, nerds, geeks, and idiots are not regular guys! Regular guys are masculine! What the Left thinks is insane is what we think is masculine!

All the behaviors that the Left cites as indicating that Trump is insane are the same behaviors that will get him re-elected! It’s SO good to have a regular guy in the OO! TRUMP! TRUMP! TRUMP!




Filed under Conservatism, Culture, Democrats, Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Labor, Left, Liberalism, Man World, Political Science, Politics, Psychology, Race/Ethnicity, Regional, Republicans, Sex, Sociology, US Politics, USA, Whites

Men Can Get Pregnant and Have Babies Now (No Really I Am Serious)!


The old, boring, lame straight way versus the new, cool, groovy gay way. Be cool! Be groovy! Turn gay or bi or pan or sapio or whatever! Turn into the opposite sex or both sexes or neither sex or whatever! Who cares! Do whatever you want! We don’t care as long as you are having fun!

The old way versus the new way. The old way was lame and boring. They had these fake things called men and women and boys and girls and pretended that everyone got born that way! Stupid! Everyone knows a boy can turn into a girl or vice versa. A man can turn into a woman or vice versa. We can decide to be anything we want! Soon we will even decide whether we are humans or nonhuman animals! Isn’t that cool! I want to be a snake! Hell I’ve been one most of my life anyway, so why not?

In the photo above, that transman is actually pregnant. Transmen are men! They’re not woman pretending to be men or anything like that! They’re real men, as real as the dick in my pants, boys and girls! That person next to the transman is it’s husband I guess. I don’t know if that’s a man or a woman or another transman or what. Probably another transman! Now the kid can have two Daddies! One Daddy is no fun. Two are better! Better yet if both Daddies used to be Mommies. That’s even more fun, kids! Don’t all you kids with you had two Daddies who used to be Mommies too? Some kids have all the fun!

If transmen are really men and that transmen is really pregnant (and he is for sure pregnant, trust me), that means we men can get preggers now! Yeah! Morning sickness, weight gain, days of painful labor, the whole nine yards. Maybe even C-sections! Wouldn’t it be cool if guys could get one of those cool x-mark scars in their guts? What I’d love more than anything else though is stretch marks. It’s so sad that we men can’t get stretch marks and C-sections.

Men want babies! We want babies now! Give us babies, dammit!

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