This is the I Am Very Smart group. They claim that they put down pretentious idiots who brag about how smart they are, but really, if you say anything whatsoever about your intelligence, no matter how you say – shyly, normally or overbearingly – even if it is solid fact, you’re somehow “bragging” and you get on their list.
I’ve often said that intelligence is the one thing that you cannot brag about even if you are superior.
- Get laid a lot? Crow away.
- Making lots of money? Hear, hear!
- Great athlete? Tell us more!
- 6’2? Wow, I am breathless!
- Handsome or beautiful? We know, we know! Don’t you tell us. We’ll tell you! By the way, can I have your number, cutie?
- Calm under pressure? My hero!
- Amazingly healthy? You should be a doctor!
- Charming, witty, extroverted, life of the party? Swoon.
- Got a fancy degree? Show us! Show us!
- Got an award for anything on Earth? Can I see it? Is it framed?
- Got a fancy, high paying job? Wow, a high quality man. I thought there weren’t any left. You married, sexy?
- Got a hollow leg? How do you do it? Can I borrow your stomach for a few decades?
- Athletic talent? He was climbing jungle gyms at age two? Wow! Future NBA star. Such a bright future.
- Mechanical talent? He was taking apart clocks and putting them back together at age three? Wow a mechanical genius! I am impressed!
- Artistic talent? I can’t believe he was doing portraiture at age five! Your son is the next Picasso!
- Genius IQ? Braggart! Who cares about your IQ score? You’re a social failure for even bringing it up! Get away from me! You suck! I hate nerds! Nerds can’t get laid lol. I’d rather have a sexy gardener than a pencil necked geek! Dumb people are better anyway! Smart people suck! I hate smart people! I don’t know what my IQ is and I don’t care! IQ doesn’t mean anything anyway! No one cares about your brain, it’s what you do with it, loser (never mind that everyone cheers for any other inborn superiority)! Ew, social retard, talking about his IQ! Offensive! IQ doesn’t even measure intelligence anyway! No one cares about IQ, you idiot! You know a lot of smart people are idiots and a lot of dumb people are geniuses? Has your brain ever gotten you laid, pencil neck, lol? Nobody like a brain, go crawl under a rock, egghead. Intellectuals are borrrrrrrring, yawn. Problem with smart people is the ain’t got no common sense! You say something Einstein – Sorry I was sleeping? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz what were droning about again? Have you ever noticed that smart people are lame clods with glasses who are complete dorks lol?