Are Straight Men Afraid of Gay Men?

The answer, by and large, is of course yes, but it’s not for the stupid lies that the Cultural Left talks about. I answered this question on Quora, and here is my answer:

By far the worst homophobes of all are straight women. Their homophobia is off the charts bonkers insane nuts kooky a little bit scary ranting and raving and maniacal.

However, they do not hate gay men in general. Most women who feel this way have some gay male besties who I call their gay pets. Anyway, they seem to love these gay men a lot and nowadays, if you are a homophobic straight man, a lot of straight women will threaten to dump you! They don’t want you talking crap about their gay friends or relatives who they indeed dearly love.

But these same women can become almost psychotically homophobic for one reason: If they suspect that the straight men that they are dating are even .00000001% gay or even not 1,000% masculine. Straight women very much demand very masculine straight men, and non-masculine (but not effeminate) men lead rather difficult lives filled with a lot of abuse from girlfriends about them not being masculine enough or being suspected gays. You really cannot be too masculine for a straight woman.

I know this very well because I am a straight androgyne. I have an extremely strong, almost hypermasculine masculine side of me, and then there is a pretty strong feminine side too, I admit. The result is nobody can figure me out, and they can’t make any sense of me at all. I get a lot of “You don’t make sense,” and “Are you straight or gay or bi or what?” Al I know is I’m David Bowie.

I am 100% straight, but I have had girlfriends accuse me of being gay. It was not a pretty picture. Picture the most ranting, raving, out of control, nearly psychotic, menacing and almost homicidal woman you have ever met. I have rarely seen such crazed hate in my life. And of course all of the ugly epithets to go along with that. “Faggot! Queer! Homo! Cocksucker!” And I’m not even gay.

Straight men are also quite homophobic, much more than they let on. Also they are fools who have no idea what man is gay and what man is not, when actually it is quite trivial to discover if you know the man well. The homophobia of straight people is directed not so much at gays (who are a protected class nowadays and also many straights have gay “pets”) but is directed at ostensibly straight people who they think are closeted or secretly gay.

I have always said that straights direct most of their homophobic abuse at other straight people, especially straight men. They don’t seem to care much about gay men. But they want to keep those two societies separate. Gay society over there, straight society over here. Straights spend most of their time in straight circles (I don’t blame them), and they are annoyed to enraged by the idea that there are secret or closeted homosexuals running around straight society pretending to be straight.

Many straight men act nervous or uncomfortable around me or do not want to get close to me. This was true of even some of my best friends. I don’t think straight men hate gay men, but they are very nervous about getting close to them or being friends with them, and they are insanely suspicious of homosexuality in their ostensibly straight friends. Suspicion of homosexuality in ostensibly straight men is at off the charts insane levels in straight society. Straight people are really nuts about this subject.

Conclusion: Straight society is still horribly, almost insanely homophobic, but not so much towards gay men (a protected class) but towards suspected closeted or secret gays in their midst (most of whom are just straight men) and homosexual tendencies (most of which don’t exist) among ostensibly straight men.


Filed under Gender Studies, Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, Left, Man World, Sex, Women

31 responses to “Are Straight Men Afraid of Gay Men?

  1. Jason Y

    I don’t think that’s always true. I mean I got stuff thrown at me like that from women and men, but only after speaking my mind on social media.

    Anyhow, if it were true women hated feminine guys, then they wouldn’t fall for all these, well, basically, effeminate guys. Of course, there is a sub-group of bitches who demand nothing less than Marine corps type guys, usually to compenstate for a having no parents, or weak parents as a child.

    • Jason Y

      Another thing to bring up is the fact 12 – 15 year old girls like Justin Bieber and boy bands, and those guys are incredibly effeminate… Later on girls have obsession with guys in hair bands, guys who can write poetry and sing them songs etc.. A lot of these guys are very androgynous. Now, the macho guys on the other hand actually sometimes scare or vastly turn off these women.

      • That’s different. Teenage girls are not obsessed with masculinity and they go for looks above everything else. Pretty boy handsome types often do great as teenagers and young men when women love pretty boys, but then they don’t do so well as they age. Beyond her early 20’s, a woman starts demanding a more masculine man. Pretty boys don’t cut it anymore.

        Androgynous guys can do great with women, but I must say that theirs is a difficult field to hoe.

        Now, the macho guys on the other hand actually sometimes scare or vastly turn off these women.

        Forget it. You can’t act too masculine for a woman. Don’t you understand? When you deal with a woman, you are not even dealing with a female human. You are dealing with a human version of a FUCKING SEAL. Ok? Get it? When it comes to things like that, women are unable to rise above the level of lower mammals. Their behavior isn’t even human. It’s the behavior of a female seal or a female deer.

      • Haha. Show me all these women who are turned off by macho guys.

        Red PIllers FTW. Listen to the Red Pillers. They say,

        “Don’t pay attention to what a woman says, pay attention to what she does.”

        If you don’t get that out, you will never understand women.

      • Jason Y

        Usually money Trumps everything else (pun not intended). The women really just want money.

    • The emphasis on masculinity as one of the most important things in a woman’s life because she chooses her partners on this basis is one of the things that the Red Pillers have gotten right. I hate to say it, but it’s true. Why do you think women like bad boys. They’re masculine! One thing women really hate is wimpy men and women think that soft or passive men are wimpy, but often they are not at all.

      Wimpy means won’t fight. I have known some pretty soft or passive men who are not wimps at all. You better believe they will fight! Some of them were capable of such aggression that they were even dangerous. One told me that he killed a man once and he would do it again. I believed him. He was scary as Hell, but he wasn’t macho at all. In fact, he was always getting called gay by people.

      Also a lot of soft or passive men are bad boys too. That’s what people don’t get. Not all bad boys are macho. I have known some bad boys who were not macho at all. And they were bad boys all right, I mean REAL bad boys.

      If you are soft, passive and not macho, you are going to have a hard time with women. Your life is going to be filled with evil bitches attacking your masculinity, calling you gay, bossing you around, laughing at you, starting fights with you in public, bitching you out and trying to dominate you. This has sort of been the story of my life and it keeps repeating again and again. In some ways, my life with women has been quite successful, but in other ways, I have not had a very good life.

      I say this as a warning to other men.

      Women are really nuts about this subject and they are incapable of being rational. All of this behavior is a result of women acting like female elk or female seals. This is very primitive mammalian behavior on their part, they don’t realize they are doing it, they have no idea why they do it, and they are powerless to change it because a woman cannot supercede her instincts. Why women can’t think their way out of being a human version of a seal, I don’t know. Maybe their minds are not strong enough. Nietzsche probably had something to say about this.

      That’s one of the most depressing things about women. When you have a woman, you are more or less stuck with a human version of a FUCKING SEAL, and she is incapable of recognizing, understanding and certainly stopping her behavior. It’s depressing as Hell.

    • Can you show me all of these women who are with feminine or effeminate men? Give me some examples of celebrities so I know who you are talking about.

      • Jason Y

        I wouldn’t bother with bitches obsessed with masculinity. If that means 90 percent of them. Well, then fuck em. Which is what I won’t be doing LOL

      • Jason Y

        Wimpy means won’t fight. I have known some pretty soft or passive men who are not wimps at all. You better believe they will fight! Some of them were capable of such aggression that they were even dangerous. One told me that he killed a man once and he would do it again. I believed him. He was scary as Hell, but he wasn’t macho at all. In fact, he was always getting called gay by people.

        So do you think that’s why women seem like that they’re drawn toward jocks?

        Also, again I really think a lot of bitches, just like the Nazi type male bitches are douchebags seeking a father figure to make up for a childhood lacking in order, discipline, and moral standards. Why should anyone conform to these psychos?

        • Jason Y

          Another thought is perhaps women are just seeking someone smart and/or with money, that would seem to conform to evolutionary theory. Since a lot of men have neither, that’s why they don’t get any, or they’re stuck in relationships with women who don’t respect them.

          Women don’t really want a fighter; they want a leader, kind of like the way kids do.

        • Jason Y

          The only option given the thinking given, is to become a normie like my 100,000 a month wage brother who always keeps the same haircut and beard and is so gosh darn boring. I think I’d die then be that fucking boring. However, that way of looking probably keeps him from getting picked on and keeps his wife happy.

        • So do you think that’s why women seem like that they’re drawn toward jocks?

          What do you mean? Women want a guy who looks like he will fight? I don’t know. I would say that women want a man who looks like HE CAN DEFEND HIMSELF. If you seem like you can’t defend yourself, you’re dead meat to a lot of women. They will really have contempt for you for that.

          What do you think?

        • Does the wife of your Normie brother respect him?

          That’s all that’s important with women. Your woman needs to have respect for you. If she does not respect you, you in for a lot of hurt and you will be living in a World Of Shit. Take it from me.

        • Jason Y

          Of course women will respect a good leader, but not necessarly one that can fight. Well, think about it, you don’t really need to know how to fight nowadays. For instance, my normie brother had a situation where somebody wanted to live in mom’s house and she objected. So he sent him a text message telling him to fuck off. That’s all he did. Acutally, all he would need to do is phone the cops.

          First of all with women, you have to show charsima, you probably also need to show a steady source of income, and you need leadership ability. Cause we all know darn well these goobers, dorks that women like cannot fight. They aren’t boxers, probably they couldn’t last 2 minutes in a fight.

  2. Jason Y

    Yes it is true women don’t want wishy washy guys, but they’re not going for fighters, only leaders. They might even tolerate a sensitive guy, if they think he is competent and can lead. Look at James Taylor, he’s a huge success, and he’s also massively sensitive, as evident from his songs.

    I do know one guy who is wishy washy, and I even said to him that this personality defect is hurting him, even though he even has a lot of muscles, yet he cannot get a lot of girls or socialize. But then again he has massive mental illness.

  3. RockT

    Nobody is ‘afraid’ of them (as “phobia” implies). Nobody. Not a one. If anything, they are projecting their fears onto us, this would not be necessary if their ‘way’ was not recently politicized.

    • I don’t know. I don’t want them to get too close to me. There were a couple of gay guys (or seemed that way) at the coffee shop I went to. They were very nice to me and vice versa and it did not bother me 1% to deal with them at the counter, but if they actually tried to make friends with me, that might be another matter altogether. I suppose I might feel frightened. And when gay men have propositioned me or come onto me real hard, I assure you that I found that very frightening. I would almost have a panic attack.

      So sometimes we are afraid of them.

      I know a couple of guys who saw West Hollywood for the first time. If you go there, to certain streets anyway, obviously homosexual men are EVERYWHERE. I mean like EVERYWHERE. It’s like the Castro in Frisco. And on a Saturday nite, it seems like there are 100,000 fucking gay men cruising Santa Monica and those streets around it. All of a sudden, right in your face, are countless openly gay men as far as you can see.

      I know a couple of guys who told that the first time they saw that, they were absolutely terrified. Just sheer, utter terror.

      They both identified as straight too, and I think they were straight because I knew them and I can tell orientation very well.

    • Straight men are mostly not afraid of gay men, but I think they are afraid of homosexuality or homosexual behavior or acts. It seems like when it comes to homosexual behavior, most men act frightened, disgusted or angry or some combination. I think they find the idea that they might do something like that frightening. It’s like the way they feel about a warzone. Warzones and gay sex are scary and repulsive and those are places they don’t want to be and things they don’t want to do.

      I remember I used to imagine myself going to prison and being homosexually raped or forced into gay sex and I found that idea to be utterly terrifying. So much so that I tried very hard to stay out of prison.

      I think most straight men are afraid of others thinking they are gay, let’s put it that way. Most straight men DO NOT want people thinking they are gay. This is very upsetting to them, and I think a lot of machista behavior is men’s way of screaming I’M NOT GAY GOD DAMMIT at the whole world.

  4. Tulio

    I find effeminate acting men to repulsive, whether gay or straight. I want nothing to do with them. I can be ok with gay men who basically act straight(guys like CNN’s Anderson Cooper). But if we’re talking about the real queens who act like like stereotypical fags that you see frolicking around gay parades, then FUCK NO I don’t want to be around them. I’m not befriending them and I want nothing to do with them. I’m live and let live, I have no desire to stop them from expressing themselves, I just don’t want to be around flamboyant gay men in any capacity. Their vibe makes my skin crawl. I’ve known gays that act nothing like that and I’m cool with them.

    A few years ago I went to the biggest gay club in W. Hollywood before I moved from Los Angeles. It was just one of those, “what the hell, let me do everything in LA I can do before leaving” things. My friend actually goes in there frequently and says it’s a great spot to pick up straight girls and has had good luck doing that. So I said fuck it and went to The Abbey. It wasn’t that bad. You have to get used to seeing guys making out and dancing together and male go-go dancers on stage wearing banana hammocks. I was scared to go in, imagine my ass getting groped by gay men. But that didn’t happen. I only had 1 guy flirt with me the whole night. And all he did was wink. My friend said the gay men there know that straight guys come in there to hit on straight girls and they don’t care. They can easily tell which guys are gay and which aren’t and if you aren’t gay they pretty much ignore you. That was my experience.

    Now in retrospect, I’m glad I some nut didn’t come in there and shoot the place up. If I ended up in the hospital, I’d have to explain to all my friends and family what the hell I was going in the biggest gay club in L.A. That’s the last thing I’d want to have to explain away to my father!

    • Jason Y

      It depends on the definition of an effeminate man. Nowadays, unless the man is hyper-masculine, then he’s seen as a pussy. But you know, that’s ridiculous.

      As far as gays go, I don’t mind being around them, but I wouldn’t want to be around a lot of them.

      • It’s been said a number of times that I act gay. Supposedly I sit gay, stand gay, walk gay, talk gay, look gay, hold my coffee cup gay, have gay movements, etc. Boy I sure don’t see it that way. I don’t see myself as an effeminate man at all. In fact, I cannot stand effeminate men. The idea that I act like one of those guys pisses me off.

        I guess I’m just not hypermasculine is all.

        I had a number of friends who got called gay constantly. Not one of them were gay. They were all very goodlooking (often with pretty boy features), had soft voices, were passive, and looked sensitive. One guy was really into fashion. Not one of these guys was 1% effeminate. You don’t have to be effeminate to be called gay and I think most straight guys who get called gay are not effeminate at all.

        Truly effeminate straight men are quite rare. I have met a few of them in my time, but they are NOT common. Also a lot of them can turn it on and turn it off.

        I knew one older married man who seemed to have two personalities:

        FAGGOT with a capital – This was an extremely effeminate, faggoty man. The time I saw him like this was late one Saturday nite and some very effeminate gay man next door was visiting. I was like WTF. The wife didn’t care that her husband was acting like a flaming queen – in fact she seemed to regard it as cute or funny.

        MACHO MAN: This was a regular macho, bearded, tough guy man who was a badass and into chicks, always talking about women and pussy. Really hard, tough man.

        I knew this WEIRD couple for some time, and after a while, I figured out that the husband seemed to be definitely bisexual. FAGGOT was like the gay side of his orientation, and MACHO MAN was like the straight side.

        It was weird as fuck, man. The whole experience sort of creeped me out.

        • Jason Y

          I don’t think people get bashed for being effeminate unless they are running thier mouth, as happened to me one time, as I tend to speak my mind on social media. So actually a lot of the hate seems to come from one’s mouth and not really being gay.

          In reality when people are calling you a faggot or a pussy, it’s more like they’re calling you a big mouth or a dickhead etc.. At least that’s the way it is in my neck of the woods.

  5. jorge

    It’s curious, because it is said that many Paraguayan women seek to Argentine men like couples because Paraguayan men are too masculine and male chauvinist (I don’t know if exist an English word for “machista”).

    At least this happens with Paraguayan women that live in Argentina, especially in big cities. They have the image of middle-class/upper-class Argentine men, that are more “sensitive”. Working-class and underclass Argentine men are not so differente from Paraguayan ones, but still are less masculine, except maybe in northeast of the country, where I live, that, in those lower classes, people it is very similar to Paraguayan, and Paraguayan women know this, that’s why they prefer men from another regions, especially from Buenos Aires.

  6. jorge

    Well, probably I’m less masculine than regular working-class/underclass Argentine men (or at least from my region, that is very similar to Paraguay in many ways, in fact I live in a mid-sized city in the border, and we are separate by Parana river), maybe because I’m a bit intellectual, but I’m more masculine than most part of middle class men, and definitely more than upper-class men.

    For example I have friends that literally would fuck any woman that seduce them, no matter her physical appareance (although obviously they prefer those who they consider “cute”, that are women with the typical Western stereotype of beauty). Meanwhile, I don’t like fat girls, although I never would offend them, in all case, I refuse “chivalrously”. In fact, when some girl don’t liked me physically (and is only a option for fuck), I don’t try to fuck her even if she want. For one side, I’m not interested, for the other side, I’m afraid to not fuck her well and be critizised, or, worst, that she tell to her friends (if is some girl known by me).

    For many men/women (especially from working-class/underclass), this is seen as a weakness, something very unmanly. “Real men” have to fuck any woman who want to do it with him. There is a famous saying that says “todo bicho va a parar al asador” (every bug that walks, will end in the grill), wich originally talk about that a human can eat any animal, but also is used by men referring to women, like saying that can fuck everyone, no matter if she is cute or ugly. But also many men talk about this but are hypocrite because they would reject women that they don’t like physically. And also exist like a saying (or idea) that says “un pete no se le niega a nadie” (blowjob is not denied to anyone), that means that you don’t have to reject no woman that want to suck your cock, even if you don’t want fuck her.

    And I’m not aggressive verbally against women (much less physically, for me this is unacceptable), while many women here can be quite aggressive, especially women from lower classes, who, by the way, also are much more frontal and have no shame to seduce men directly, and dressing exalting much more her tits and ass, thing that I find very attractive (the whole “I will rape you, motherfucker” attitude, not only the clothing). This kind of woman (especially from underclass) also usually have much more experience in sex and since a younger age than middle-class/upper-class ones. So, if they are attracted to you, they would fuck you like if this were the last sexual relationship of their lifes.

    My masculine side maybe have to be that I’m not into fashion at all, I dress up a bit unkempt, I’m a little violent (especially with football) when I drink alcohol, and I talk in vulgar way with other men.

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