Monthly Archives: August 2009

The Caffeine Rats

Repost from the old site.

It’s a long story, but the last time I worked consistently, from 1994 to 1996, I was so damn tired all the time that I was drinking lots and lots of caffeine. I figured out all sorts of inventive ways to take it, in pills, in herbal tablets, in drinks, you name it.

Then I added ephedrine. At one point, I was taking one 30mg tablet per hour every waking hour, and my blood pressure was still 103/56. I know it doesn’t make sense.

After a while of this, my blood pressure started going nuts. I eventually stopped getting it checked. I would go into the doctor’s office, and I would openly refuse to have my BP checked. The doctors were getting really mad and telling me I was going to die. I said, “I know,” and shrugged my shoulders. We’re all going to die; this is news?

Every now and then I would get a reading for the Hell of it. One was like 185/107 or something. They gave me a drug called Captopril, and it seemed like it crashed the pressure down, but it also seemed like it made me tired for at least weeks.

I started getting all kinds of weird symptoms from the hypertension (HTN), but people kept telling me I was imagining it because HTN has no symptoms. I had symptoms all right. I had pains in my chest and my throat. I had weird buzzing feelings all over my face and especially in my eyes, where it was sort of a vague pain.

I had pains in my kidneys, and my kidneys tests went off with creatinine too high. That means kidney damage. Worst of all, my feet started swelling, and that was the scariest feeling of them all.

After all, all I was trying to do was work.

America says everyone has to work all the time, or work or die, with the anti-welfare crowd, and my whole life, I’d either been working, in school, or both. If I didn’t take the stimulants, I could not work.

I had chronic fatigue. Eventually, the job ended, in part due to the fact that I would go in and sit there doing nothing much of the day. I actually couldn’t seem to lift a finger. The work was really hard anyway, and it seemed I just couldn’t do it. People kept saying I was depressed, but I insisted I wasn’t.

The job ended, and I lived off my credit card for a while. After a while, that charade could not play out any longer, and I went to a bankruptcy attorney who called me a thief. I got up and walked out of his office and never came back.

The bill collectors started calling, sounding like Cousin Luigi from Detroit. I eventually quit answering the phone. I was still on caffeine, and the BP was still too high.

Eventually, I just declared bankruptcy and blew off $12,000 in debt. Now I was on the credit card black list.

I moved back in with my parents.

I was 41 years old. My life was a wreck.

I was going around to doctors and the diagnosis was “chronic fatigue.” I kept getting treated like shit by doctor after doctor, and I turned into a “doctor shopper.” Not because I was looking for someone to validate my fake symptoms, but because I was getting pissed off at doc after doc treating me like shit. I’d take it for a while, and then say Fuck You and move on, and the new doc would be the same.

I kept noting stuff that made it seem like a sinus infection or allergies, but everyone kept laughing me off. Everyone was saying it was all in my head, and when it came to the illness, everyone was treating me like crap. They kept saying I was depressed. I kept saying No I’m not.

Finally, I went to an allergy doc, and they diagnosed chronic sinusitis.

I’m under treatment, but I haven’t really worked for real for 13 years now.

But during the time I was on tremendous quantities of caffeine, I noticed something.

The caffeine rats.

You see them out of the corners of your eyes. They’re always scurrying, about the size of a rat, and when you turn to look for them, they are gone. I saw them more than once. I scaled down the caffeine, and they went away. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything before or since.

Other drugs have similar syndromes. On ayahuasca you usually see tigers. On high doses of cocaine you start to feel and maybe even see bugs crawling under your skin. They’re called coke bugs.

Then there’s the caffeine rats. I wonder if I’m the only one?


Filed under Reposts From The Old Site

A Skunk and Potatoes Man

Repost from the old site.

When I was working as an anthropologist for a local Indian tribe, I had to go through all of the anthropological literature about the tribe. This took quite some time. There was quite a bit of hostility from the Indians towards the anthropologists, which is stupid, sad and mostly just ignorant.

The legend had grown up among many of the Indians that the anthropologists who had come through were the “enemies of the Indian people.” I researched the folks who had come through and it didn’t seem to fit.

We are talking some of the biggest names of all like Alfred Kroeber. Kroeber and his wife loved the Indians in a time at the turn of the century when Indians were not so popular. The legend continued that the crafty Indians, in order to fool the wicked White men, had concocted lies to tell the anthropologist.

Anthropological field work is hard enough without having to deal with this kind of crap, but it does come up at times. Fieldwork manuals will tell you, first of all, that you need to develop a strong sense of cultural relativity if you are going to do fieldwork.

You have to decide that pretty much whatever it is these folks do in terms of their culture and values, no matter how weird, stupid, horrible or noxious, it’s ok. You aren’t going to make any judgments about it. You want to chop off little girls’ clits? Ok, no big.

You put grandpa on an ice floe when he gets old? Understandable, I’d do the same with my own Dad.

You treat your women like shit? Hey, I can understand, in dating countless women over a lifetime, I’ve built up a nice boiling witches brew of hatreds and grievances myself. Keep them ball-breaking bitches down! You go, guys! Show them cunts who’s in charge! Damn right they better put out or else! They owe us! We rule!

I think you get the picture.

This sort of thing may prove difficult for many folks.
In fieldwork, you need to do this to get along properly with your subjects. If you don’t accept their lifestyle with “unconditional positive regard,” it’s probably not going to work very well. You get subjects lying to you, like they did with Margaret Mead, and all sorts of stuff.

I actually spent a lot of time on this agonizing question, and I called up famous anthropologists all over the country in trying to solve this empirical question. Had the evil White anthropologists really been had by these crafty noble savages, fresh out of Paleolithic?

Turns out they probably had not. Further, I uncovered a lot of data that suggested that all of the anthros had had a good relationship with their informants.

Another thing you can do is go through all of the old data and see how well it all lines up. Turns out that all of the data I had from 1873 through 1970 lined up very well.

There were times when I spotted some lying. Indians said that wild horses and buffalo used live in Central California, and they used to hunt them. The last wild horses lived here 10,000 years ago, and buffalo never did. The anthro himself wrote in his field notes that he thought they were lying to him.

There are several ways to test this. One thing you can do is to interview informants over a period of time, say weeks or months. You can work with a single informant any number of times over that period. You can ask the same question over and over a few times and see if the answers vary.

Another thing you can do is go around to different informants and ask the same question. If only one informant says, yeah, we ate vultures for breakfast and the others say, “Hell no, we did not, he’s lying,” then vulture-eater is probably lying.

You can interview informants alone and with others, changing the others around, and see if their stories change when they are with various others compared to what they say when they are alone. You can shoot questionable material to others and see if they back it up. In fact, you need to try to back up all of your data. One informant is pretty shaky.

It all rests on the sort of relationship you have with your informants. Bad relationship = possibility of poor data. Good relationship portends good data.

I decided that there was some tragic reason why the Indians harbored this hatred for the anthros. Obviously, the anthros just represented Whitey.

Plus many of them had this crazy idea that all the anthros had used the Indians, gone back to Berkeley or wherever and used this illustrious knowledge to write famous books about the Indians and got rich. The anthros got rich, and the Indians never saw a dime. It’s not true, but it felt good to them.

There was a sadder aspect to this anger. All of the great stuff on these Indians had been written by White people. Everything on the language, the culture, everything.

Why couldn’t the Indians write down about their language and culture themselves? The suggestion is that they are too stupid to do that, so they have to have the Smart White Man come and do it for them, and that’s totally humiliating. A reaction to humiliation is rage.

I went through Sylvia Broadbent’s Grammar of Southern Sierra Miwok as part of my work. One informant, who worked as some sort of “House Indian” in Yosemite National Park, was well-known for being a showman, liar, and teller of tales. He also knew a lot of language, but he threw in lots of other words that other informants had never heard before. She ended up rejecting a lot of his data as spurious.

As you can see, this is not exactly hard science. Where do you think “physics envy” comes from? It gets hard to get mathematical proofs of much of anything in the social sciences, which is why the physicists sneer that we our sciences are “soft sciences”.

So much of our judgments in these tough cases in fieldwork is play it by ear, seat of the pants, I know it when I see it, intuitive stuff.

Unfortunately my project floundered over some of the Indians’ rage at the anthropologists. I had gathered all this damned data and was all set to write it up, and the whole thing got shot down.

Because elders said that the Indians had lied to the anthros, every word of the notes was up for grabs. There were known knowns, known unknowns and worst of all, unknown unknowns, the last category being what the otherwise non-empirical Indians deemed the notes.

I was on a salary anyway, so it really didn’t matter.

One of the amusing things was the sort of stuff that they disputed. They were livid about the notes where the Indians said that they used to eat skunks, rattlesnakes and gopher snakes.

Their rejection of this food, of which the rattlesnakes at least are proven to taste precisely like chicken (of course), is based on a primitive but common mode of thinking. Rattlesnakes are poisonous, so they are evil, so they should not be eaten. The suggestion is that the meat is poison too. Only an idiot would eat poison meat.

Skunks smell horrible when you piss them off, so obviously their meat must taste like their horrid odor. Someone else opined that their meat is “probably pretty oily.”

Turns out, according to the New York Times in 1913, skunk is one of the delicacies of the woods, right up there with possum, deer and bear. The main obstacle in the way of proper enjoyment are the speed bumps of human psychology. As long as you associate the meat with skunk-stink, it might taste pretty bad. Convince yourself it’s really Fillet Mignon and dig in for a hearty meal.

Tender eating , skunk meat tastes like either chicken (obviously), goose, duck or rabbit, depending on your powers of dissociation. You really need to figure out how to dress skunk meat properly so you keep the stink away from the choice cuts.

Baked skunk recipe here.

As I feel I’ve been figuratively eating skunk most of my life anyway, I may as well take the plunge some day.

If it’s really as good as they say it is, I assume it will be coming to Chez Panisse or Spago anytime now.

The gopher snake was also rejected as food, but I have often wondered what they tasted like. A while back, I was catching them by the side of the road a lot. If they were near dead, I’d bring them home and throw them on the lawn for my cats to play with, or drag them around on the lawn and let the cats chase them.

Of course I washed the snake blood off my hands and my car. People who saw me doing that still think I’m a really fucking weird person.

After the gopher snake died, I brought it inside and seriously thought about figuring how to cook the sucker. I finally gave up and threw it out in the woods in back. One cool thing about living in the woods is any small dead animal you toss into the woods will always vanish within 1-2 days max. Carrion doesn’t stick around long in nature; it’s the feral equivalent of dumpster-diving.

I later asked some people how to slice up and cook a gopher snake, and everyone I asked thought it was one of the most outrageous things they had ever heard. I guess they still think I’m weird too.

Anyway, the Indians insisted that they never ate gopher snake. “Ugh!” One Indian said, “They taste like dirt. It lives in the ground!” He curled up his nose.

I’m told this is more erroneous thinking, and the guy’s probably never chowed down one anyway. This cognitive error states that a thing tastes like what it lives in. Gopher snakes spent a lot of time in subterranean mode pushing up daisies but living to tell about it, so therefore, they must taste like dirt. It lives in dirt; it tastes like dirt. Probably not. By this logic, pork tenderloin ought to taste like mudpies, and it doesn’t.

Of course, inquiring minds the world over (Well, at least me anyway) are dying to know the ins and outs of how to hunt, kill, and skin skunks. Forget the kitchen for now. Procurement and dressing are tough enough.

Try here. Turns out skunks may be trapped, shot, killed by bow and arrow, drowned or asphyxiated with car exhaust. Clearly the trick is to kill em without getting sprayed. This ends up being quite the challenge. Skunk dressing is so involved that colleges ought to offer six-month courses for certificates in it.

The first story here is quite amusing. It’s pretty much skunk-skinning gone wrong about every way it could. I got a kick.

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Filed under Reposts From The Old Site

All the World’s a Polygraph, and We Are All Liars

Repost from the old site.

In reference to the title, one time I when I was working as a linguist, this woman from New York came to work for us. She was a bitch from Day One. She knew it all, and boy did she. She was pissed, and after a bit, I figured it out. She had gotten a BA and here she was, slaving as a secretary. What a failure.

She was a vegetarian, and she when I told her I ate meat, she gave me these dagger eyes and said pointedly, “I know. All meat-eaters smell terrible to us vegans.” It just kind of went on and on like that for some time.

Being an introvert and pretty much of a puss at work (I call this the “office puss” role that men who work in offices must play), I kept on smiling and sucking up to her and trying to be nice. Whenever anyone’s mean to us, we introverts usually figure we fucked up and that’s why they are properly treating us with the contempt, scorn, coldness or indifference we deserve. So I kept trying to act better, and she kept being a bitch.

One day she came to me all apologetic and baffled. “I don’t know what’s wrong,” she shook her head. Turned out I wasn’t the only recipient of her bitch-rays. The whole office was.

“The boss told me that I’m not being nice to people but I just can’t see it. I think I’m nice to everyone but she says everyone says I’m mean. None of this makes any sense to me.”

I’d already figured her out long ago. She was a headstrong, independent type. Within a few weeks of moving from New York to California, she had herself a decent guy and had already moved him in. Good work. Boy, women have it so tough. They can get laid anytime they want. I’m crying so hard for them now I can barely type.

She had the got it together mindset that tended to look down on 90% of the population as fuckups.

And one thing you need to know about angry people is that 95% of the time, 95% of angry people deny their anger and general shittiness, especially when they are beating up on weaker people, which all angry people do. I’m not sure what the psychological mechanism is, but I think it’s important to know this. Ever heard an angry person say, “I’m an asshole but I just can’t stop. I need Assholes Anonymous.”? Course not.

Anyway, she came from New York and brought her New York Bitch attitude with her. Back there, it’s normal. I guess they say, “Have a nice day” the same way we say, “Fuck you.”

She was here to apologize to me for being a bitch, on bosses’ orders under penalty of being fired if not done, though she had done nothing. Would I accept her apology? Sure. Was she being a bitch? Well, yeah, she was, I nodded.

Look, kiddo. I sat down on the curb with her.

This is how you do it. You need to start faking your feelings. I asked her how she felt about her boss and her co-workers. I think she hated the boss, but I’m not sure about the co-workers. She liked me just fine, though she treated me like shit, but she could not see it.

I said, “Look. The boss pisses me off too. And some of these co-workers really piss me off. But I’m not sure if they know it. What do I do? I disguise my feelings. Here is what you do. Go ahead and feel any way you want about your boss and co-workers, but adjust your feelings when you have to actually deal with them.”

“Say you have to go talk to the boss. Forget that you hate her. Walk into the room, smile and act like you love her. Don’t fake it, because that shows. Actually brainwash yourself into thinking she is the greatest boss in the world and believe it as hard as you can.

“Then after you walk out the door, mutter under your breath what a bitch she is. This is what you do. You play roles all the time. I usually don’t show people my true feelings and I’m always putting on some kind of show or other.”

She was dumbstruck.

“You actually do this? How long have you been doing this?”

“Oh, ten years at least, maybe even longer.”

Then she started in about how this was awful as it was not genuine and honest. It was lying. This was horrible and dishonest and probably even ought to be illegal. Anyway, it was immoral. In New York, everyone wears the heart on sleeve, and that’s they are all so ornery. But at least they are moral.

This thing I was arguing, it was so – Californian! To put on a mask, to lie to everyone, to lie all the time, to always be faking it, to never be real.

“Well,” I suggested. “What good is being honest when it gets you fired?”

She did agree that I had a point.

“Look,” I said. “Another thing you can do is save it up. All day long, no matter how much you hate the boss, every time you think of her, think of how actually you really love her and she is the greatest boss on Earth.”

“At 5:03 PM, as you are pulling onto the highway to drive home, you may begin cursing the evil boss. If need be, you may curse, swear and pound upholstery all the way home. But the next day at work, you put all that away, walk in the door to the greatest boss on Earth again.”

She acted like this was really evil, but I suggested it was better than getting your ass fired. She nodded humbly. She asked me if I did this at work. All the time, I assured her.

Then she went on her way.

Every time she saw me after that, she was always smiling at me and had this really weird look on her face, like she was looking at me trying to figure out what I really thought of her or what in God’s name was going on in my head.

It’s the way you look at some weird object when you can’t figure out what the heck it is, turning it over, poking around at it, putting it up close and then far away, showing it around.

I was a walking fucking enigma.

I’d given her the evil secret of being a 24-7 liar, but at least it was keeping her ass off the curb.


Filed under Reposts From The Old Site

“Rationalization and its Discontents,” by Alpha Unit

New post by Alpha Unit, our guest poster.

The late Eldridge Cleaver admitted – in his book Soul on Ice – that he deliberately targeted White women for rape. He did it out of hatred and resentment toward White men. This is well known.

This sociopathic criminal apparently could not bring himself to face his real enemy – the White man. He didn’t go around targeting White men for execution for what they had done to Black men. Instead, he targeted the White man’s woman.

But he was deluded. Who could he have possibly persuaded that his conduct was about anyone other than himself?

Most Black people harbor some resentment toward Whites. Some of it is based on our knowledge and understanding of our history in this country. A lot of it is based on experiences we have everyday in this country. Serious things like being shot and killed because the police think you’re a criminal and you made the wrong move with your hands. Things like that.

Sometimes it’s little things like being followed around in stores, even though you don’t shoplift. Or going up to the counter in a busy establishment to pay for an item and being ignored, while White people who got there after you did are immediately “seen” and served. Or being mistaken for a valet when you’re one of the customers. Every Black person over a certain age has these stories.

But sometimes resentment, or entitlement, is a result of indoctrination. Years ago when I was quite young, I was doing my laundry in the neighborhood laundromat, which was owned by an older White man who was one of the nicest people I had ever met. On this particular day, the White gentleman wasn’t in. But there was a group of Black kids there, some doing laundry and others just hanging out.

These kids had figured out how to manually remove cans of soda from the soda machine–without first inserting coins. And they proceeded to do just that.

The boy removing sodas from the machine was handing them round to his friends, and they were all acting as if there wasn’t anything the least bit improper about what they were doing. The boy looked at me and in a friendly voice asked me if I wanted one. I shook my head and said no. Do you know what they began to tell me, almost in unison?

“But it’s a White man.”

They were telling me that the owner was a White man. So it was okay to steal his sodas.


Who told them that?

What these kids were doing had no more to do with the White Man than what Eldridge Cleaver had been doing. They had given themselves a reason to do something they were already inclined to do.

That’s what people tend to do a lot of the time. They feel inclined to do something, but for all kinds of reasons they have to pretend that it is the perfectly rational thing to do under the circumstances.

But that’s what you have in common with your enemy, you know. He was utterly convinced, too, of the necessity of what he did. Of the importance and appropriateness of it.

Just as you are.


Filed under Alpha Unit, Guest Posts, Psychology

New Daily Record On Robert Lindsay

A new record for 5th highest hits in a day was set on Saturday, August 29th when we got 3,543 hits. There were an additional 83 visits to the old site, where traffic is really dropping off lately, for a total of 3,626 hits total for the day. There were quite a few hits for Final Katrina Death Toll at 4,081, since yesterday was the fourth anniversary of the hurricane.

My death toll is about 2,500 higher than the official one because I included excess deaths that occurred in New Orleans for 6 months after the hurricane. According to the theory of excess mortality, now standard in epidemiology, that is a valid assumption on my part.

No MSM source has linked to my total, but the MSM pretty much ignores bloggers anyway. I don’t know if they think we are competition or if we are somehow below them, but it’s like we’re not even there.

There were also a lot of hits for Liberal Race Realism Starting To Grow. I don’t have any ulterior motives about this project at all. I’m just a standard liberal-Leftist who has finally caved in under the mountain of evidence in favor of race realism.

Now I’m trying to fashion some sort of a liberal project that accounts for these facts of our species, but it’s not so easy, because race realism tends to feed back automatically into racism, supremacism, separatism, apartheid, segregation, which are all various forms of reaction. In particular, it feeds into the Far Right like Traditional Catholicism, libertarianism, Southern Rights idiots, fascism and often out and out Nazism.

Given that, it’s obvious why the liberal-Left fights so hard to deny these facts. Nevertheless, facts are facts, and you can only deny empirical science for so long. I’m convinced we liberal-Lefties are not going to get away with shouting down, bullying, threats and thuggery to make these unpleasant facts go away. At some point the dam’s got to burst.

It’s hard to believe that we keep on setting records here, but we do.


Filed under Meta, Vanity

No Mercy For Russians! Now Available On This Blog

I was hosting that video on the new blog I set up on Blogger, Robert Lindsay Returns, but I finally converted it out of .flv and into .wmv format and was able to upload it here. This is really better because now I can put an underage blocker on it to try to keep the kids out.

This video is seriously evil and I really advise regular readers to think twice whether or not you really want to subject your soul to this. I had to watch a bit of it tonite to convert it, and I couldn’t watch it. I removed the screen so just the sound was on, and I couldn’t even handle that. Those poor guys wheezing – Good God, man.

The more I think about this video, the more I think the title should be something Nietzschean like There Is No God. That’s the only sensible lesson you walk away with after watching this mess.

And in case you’re wondering, everyone in the video is dead. Sure, the six executed Russian soldiers are dead, but so are all those Chechen bastards who killed them. After the video was made, the Russian OMON Special Forces tracked these fuckers down and killed just about every single one of them.

They caught the leader later and he was imprisoned. He was later murdered in prison, reportedly by Russian Orthodox prisoners. Rumor has it that they beheaded him. If so, what comes around, goes around. Maybe karma is real after all.

No Mercy For Russians!

Pas de Pitié Pour Les Russes: Les Tchétchènes Sont Des Coupeurs de Ttête! (French translation)

Video Shock: Nessuna Pieta Per I Russi – I Ceceni Sono Tagliatori Di Teste!! (Italian translation)


Filed under Meta

What Is Solipsism?

In the comments to the post, Even The New Republic Now Calls for a Party Purge of Corporate-owned “Centrists”, James Schipper, an excellent writer, differs regarding my definition of solipsism:

Solipsism, strictly speaking, is the philosophical theory that only I have consciousness. After all, I have no access to your consciousness, so how can I know that are conscious of anything. I can only observe your behavior.

It also means extreme egotism. See here.

a theory holding that the self can know nothing but its own modifications and that the self is the only existent thing; also : extreme egocentrism.

Or here.

Self-absorption, an unawareness of the views or needs of others.

The solipsist differs from the narcissist in that the narcissist is an egotist and has a very high opinion of himself. The solipsist may have a high, low or neutral opinion of himself, but no matter, all he thinks about is himself. The egotist does not care about other people – they’re jerks who really don’t give a damn. The solipsist may well give a damn about others, but they don’t have time to think about them, as they’re wrapped up in themselves all the time.

The narcissist won’t go to their friend’s Dad’s funeral because they doesn’t care that the friend’s Dad died. The solipsist doesn’t go because while he wanted to go out of sympathy (solipsists are sympathetic to others), they were too busy thinking about themselves, and they forgot to go. Or they  went to the funeral, but they couldn’t get into empathizing because they were wrapped up in their own issues during the service.

Similarly, the narcissist doesn’t listen to you because you are not important. They don’t care what you think. You’re nothing; it’s like you are not even there. There is a callousness about this type of thinking. You’re essentially nothing, a zero to them. The solipsist is trying to listen to you, but they’re having a hard time since their mind keeps thinking about themselves and their own stuff, so they keep asking you to repeat things.

The solipsist is not really callous – he’s just self-absorbed!

The narcissist is just an jerk. There are antisocial tendencies built right into the essence of narcissism.

If you tell the solipsist he’s a solipsist, they’re going to feel hurt because most of them are nice people, and they are really are caring and empathetic towards others, but it’s not apparent due to their extreme self-absorption. The solipsist will resolve to think about themselves less, but they may fail.

There are therapies for the solipsist. If they’re not too unhealthy, you can get the solipsist to ask questions to others about their lives and get them to talk about themselves, their lives, their feelings. Have them ask, “And how did that make you feel? That must have felt terrible. I can’t imagine feeling that way…And do you hate your father now because he left you at age three? How do you feel about him now? What do you propose to do about these feelings?”

Most people love it when you ask them about themselves, their lives, their histories, even the inner workings of their own minds, since they don’t get to talk about themselves much.

Then have the solipsist listen to the other person because after all, everyone has something interesting to say. This is good because it gets the solipsist out of their head for once. Then have the solipsist reflect on the experience of listening to the other and how good it felt to get out of their  head for once. There are rewards for being an empathetic listener.

Narcissism is much more difficult to deal with because narcissists by their nature never think that there’s a problem. They enjoy their narcissism, and they don’t know how to get outside of it anyway. It’s all they know. Egotism can be dealt with, but when it gets to the point of narcissism, it’s almost too late. The narcissist can be treated but rarely is, since once again, the narcissist can never see that there is a problem.

All personality disorders are characterized by solipsism or self-absorption. This is why people with personality disorders often seem to have poor memories. I have told personality-disordered persons very important ongoing facts about my life (such as that I collect a trust fund from my late grandfather every month), and then several months later, repeated that fact to them.

Every time, they acted like they were hearing it for the first time. “Really? You get a trust fund? I never knew that!” That’s because they were hearing it for the first time in a way. They registered this important fact about you, but then quickly forgot it, since it’s about you, so it’s not that important. It’s not that they don’t care about you, but more that the personality-disordered person is usually running around in their own head thinking about themselves most of the time, and facts about others are assigned a lesser importance and hence drop out of memory.

One therapy of the solipsist or the egotist is to bluntly tell them, “You know what? You are not important at all. You’re nothing really. No one is important. We are all nothing. We are all grains of sand on the beach or blades of grass in the field.” If you say this to your average person, they freak out, because it offends their egotism and their sense of “niceness.”

But it really is true if you think about it.

The difference between this thinking and an that of an antisocial or narcissist is that the antisocial/narcissist thinks that they;’e God and the rest of the world are grains of sand at Waikiki.

When you lower your own ego to the same debased level as everyone else’s, there is a freedom from the cage-trap known as egotism. The great philosopher Alan Watts talks about this a lot. He’s written a lot on solipsism.


Filed under Narcissism, Personality, Personality Disorders, Philosophy, Psychology

National Review Finally Comes Out Against Illegal Immigration

Stop Illegals, Save CA, from National Review Online. National Review is, of course, the rag of the late William Buckley. Although it was never a neocon rag, when the neocons grabbed power under Bush, NR was not far in tagging along. It never became a staunch neocon outpost like The Weekly Standard, but it got taken over by the Pod People all right.

One of the standard lines of the neocons right and left was that immigration, even illegal immigration, was a fine and dandy thing. This is in keeping with the essentially Jewish nature of neoconservatism. Jews have traditionally supported mass immigration into White Gentile nations in which they are minorities for various reasons that are too complex to go into here, but it isn’t about driving Whites extinct as the anti-Semites insist.

Mostly it’s about making things safe for the Jews. Jews think that monoethnic, monoreligious White countries are bad for the Jews. These places are prone to White Christian ethnic nationalism, and history shows that that’s usually bad news for the Jews. So Jews try to create more multicultural societies in which they figure that the various ethnicities with be so split up that they won’t be able to get together and gang up on the Jews.

Anti-Semites say Jews do this so they can outcompete and rule over the White Gentiles in this lands, but I doubt if that is true. It’s more about what’s good for the Jews and paranoia about White Christian anti-Semitism.

This article is written by Alex Alexiev, and if I am not mistaken, he is a rightwing Russian Jewish ultra-neoconservative. I would have accepted this piece from a conservative WASP type, but from a Russian Jewish neocon?

I’m not sure what’s going on here. Maybe as, similar to my previous post about the apostasy of The New Republic on Centrist Democrats, a lot of useful idiots both right and left are getting fed up with drinking their Kool-Aid dogma. Illegal immigration, especially in California, has gotten so insane that even the most immigration-smitten, corporate-loving Jews have had it up to here with it. Conservatives, after all, are not insane, and it’s hard for any non-Hispanic who is in control of their mental faculties to support the illegal immigration status quo here in California.

What’s even more amazing is it’s hosted on the website of liberal National Public Radio (NPR). I don’t know NPR‘s stance on illegals, but I assume they never met an illegal alien they could not love, like most media liberals. What’s even more odd is that NPR is also full of Jews, this time the liberal variety. Are even liberal Jews starting to enough is enough to lunatic, out of control illegal immigration?

Maybe there’s hope after all.


Filed under Conservatism, Illegal, Immigration, Liberalism, Neoconservatism, Political Science, The Jewish Question

One Cop No Legs

Warning! This video has caused adverse reactions, including vomiting, in some viewers. Please exercise caution in viewing this video.

This is one seriously messed up video. A traffic cop in Vietnam gets hit by a truck and is cut in half. For about five minutes, bystanders surround him but don’t know what to do. Idiotically, no other cops, ambulances, doctors, anyone, show up. The poor guy just lies there. However, the video does end at a little over 5 minutes when the ambulance finally shows up.

He realizes what is going on, and it’s like he keeps trying to stuff his guts back in. What’s even more weird is he keeps up a running conversation with the crowd around him the whole time and does not even appear to be in tremendous pain. It’s almost like he’s asking, “Hey, could you stuff my guts back in and put my legs back on please? This is really a drag lying here chopped in half you know. For one thing, I can’t get up.”

People are complaining about the bystanders and saying that they are not doing anything. This is translated into a cultural critique of Vietnam being a backwards Third World mess where life is not valued. However, if you translate the soundtrack from Vietnamese to English, a different picture emerges.

The people are crowding around, telling him to be calm, that they have called the police, but the ambulance is being slowed down by traffic. Others are trying to stop traffic so the ambulance can get through quicker. Yet others suggest getting a local doctor who lives nearby. A Christian woman tells him to pray to Jesus to save himself.

The man says, “I’m going to die…”

At one point, angrily, he says, “Stop taking pictures of me!”

This is making the rounds on the Internet these days and it’s getting pretty popular. It was on Youtube for a bit, but it quickly got removed.

I can’t handle the beheading or murder videos on here at all. I watch em once or twice and then never again. I don’t know if there’s something wrong with me, but this video did not really upset me. For some reason, I thought it was funny. I mean, the guy’s chopped in half lying in the street, and he’s acting like there’s nothing wrong. He’s looking around at the crowd, and it’s like he’s asking them about the weather. Plus, you don’t see the guy die, so it’s not so horrible.

The poor man died on the way to the hospital.

There is some confusion between this man and Peng Shulin, a Chinese man who suffered a similar accident. That incident occurred in China in 1995, and this incident occurred in Vietnam just recently. Peng Shulin survived, but he no longer has legs and has to hop around like a human frog.


Filed under Accidents, Gross, Regional, Sick, Sick and Evil, Vietnam

Is There a New Anti-Semitism? A Conversation with Raul Hilberg

From an issue of Logos Magazine, Winter-Spring 2007, a conversation with Raul Hilberg, the Dean of Holocaust Studies.

Most Jews are pretty nuts about the subject of the Holocaust, I suppose understandably so. They don’t make sense. Their behavior is more one of a crazy and irrational person than someone saying something sensible or meaningful.

But if anyone has a right to be nuts about the subject, it’s Raul Hilberg. After all, he has been doing little us but immersing himself in Holocaust lore for 60 years, almost all of his life. His 1961 book, The Destruction of the European Jews, is considered to be one the best ever written on the subject, though I have not read it. I read a similar book by Martin Gilbert, The Holocaust: A History of the Jews of Europe During the Second World War, and it was excellent, all 976 pages of it.

An interview with Hilberg is always a joy to read.

He has a calmness and reasonableness about him that is very attractive. Almost everything he says about the Holocaust makes sense.

He points out that Jewish ownership over the word Holocaust is ridiculous. Super-Jews always freak out and scream anti-Semite if anyone else grabs their precious little word for any other reason than the approved one.

Probably in rebellion to this idiocy, there are now Holocausts and mini-Holocausts all over the place. There’s a Holocaust in the animal testing labs. There’s one in Palestine. They’re everywhere. The word the Jews wanted to turn into a Judaic religious object, to be touched only by the Jews like the Talmud, is now a degraded and near-meaningless matter of the public domain.

He also derides The New Anti-Semitism, for obvious reasons. Although a Zionist, he says some interesting things about Israel and praises Norman Finkelstein’s anti-Zionism.

Strangely enough, he makes a case that the Nazis were not anti-Semites but something different altogether.

He notes coldly that there are three solutions to the Jewish Problem: conversion, expulsion and extermination. That’s not something you say in polite company, but you just know it’s true.

He also thinks that Holocaust Denial should not be criminalized and doesn’t worry too much about it. He has previously said that Deniers do scholars some favors by raising a lot of important questions about the Holocaust that scholars need to get cracking on.

That the many Jewish expulsions of Europe began to occur not due to bad Jewish behavior as anti-Semites claim but began when all efforts at conversion of the Jews had failed seems to make sense.

All in all, great read. If more Jews acted like Hilberg, people wouldn’t dislike them so much.


Filed under Anti-Zionism, European, Fascism, History, Left, Modern, National Socialism, Nazism, Neo-Nazism, Political Science, The Jewish Question, World War 2, Zionism